U noe that feeling ...

U noe that feeling u get when u work very hard for a veryhat long time and end up you completely hate the results?

that feeling that makes you feel completely worthless because u think that nothing good happens after so long?

that feeling that makes you feel like kill yourself because you are making others who are better than you seem average?

i realli feel very very hopeless rite now

i am the lowest profile in my squad

im like the" oh ya still gt glennard hor, dunno anyhow put him anywhere aso can la" that kind of guy.

here is my proof

(tears are flowing down onto my keyboard as i write them down...)

Third class

I last to take squad, every 1 tired, i shouted command worng for 3 times then they see me so pathetic then do la

score me 0-1

creative parade

first day never do much, second day help quite a lot becuz no time liao, but still get last

score me 0-2

MOI first try at campcraft

a lot of knots dunno, then dun dare to speak up, then maam come teach me and them, so pathetic

score 0-3

MOI first try at drills

although i tried my best, t=they say no style and i failed pathetically

score 0-4

MOI second try drills

I try to make my own style but still fail

score 0-5

words of commands

I cannot shout, cannot break up command, cannot have tone, cannot have the "zai" in my voice

score 0- 6

MOI after school

my style is encouraging words but becuz no one respond then i cant do much, summore i dun have standard in my drills, not even in the top five when they chose me in the drill team.

score 0-7

second class

do my best to shout, help jian yong yo the toilet and become very tired tts why i lousy in drills , but still fail

score 0-8

posting

no squad leader

score 0-10

no head of anything

score 0-11

no nothing useful

score 0-12

now there is exactly proof and reason why I am the lowest profile in the squad.

just the " still gt glennard leh, anyhow put la he aso cannot help much" type of guy