Jun Hols: An Epilogue

Today is the last day of the june holidays
if we want to be incredibly precise, i did an infinite times more work than i had in previous holidays. if you understand any basic math, you would realise that that is only possible if i did nothing in the past and i actually DID something this time. i actually did do 2 practices on my own, not that it is actually a homework assignment, i just needed to brush up on some maths and remembered that the topics where i suck at, i lost the entire tutorial booklet. so i ended up doing what i was good at, relatively because i suck at everything else, if i merely write more than 3 lines, its considered good.

so this holidays i made an attempt to do some kind of work. unfortunately, cambridge does not accept attempts. feeling really guilty over this. every night before i go to sleep, i keep telling myself tomorrow, first thing in the morning, i'm gonna finish blah blah blah before i switch on the computer. and never has that actually happened, except the 2 times. to the future me, whom i know will read this. The moment something good happens, don't break the flow, don't say, i'm gonna take a break and then come back the next day. the breaks never gonna end. ever. EVAR!!!


ok. wow


writing that did not make me feel any better. at all.

i decided to break my 4 weeks of holidays to review them more carefully.
week 1: 1/6 to 7/6
this is probably the week with the most promise of actually doing anything, because we had to come back for 2 or 3 days for tutorials and lectures. I did not sleep, i think. i rushed mass effect with the hopes of finally starting on actual work, which i promptly did after i finished. i was proud of myself for that. but sadly the streak only lasted for 2 days, i went back to gaming.

week 2 : 8/6 to 14/6
this was probably marked by the start of my downward spiral. i discovered bob.com.sg, which was an singapore xbox forum. so i went on to the marketplace, bought a second hand game, prototype, at slightly cheaper than retail, then hoping to sell it quickly back so to minimise losses. i did, and in my rush, i had already forgotten about school. i also bought 2 months worth of online time at around $17, which further fueled my descent.

week 3: 15/6 to 22/6
the descent basically continued, i woke up, played, ate or skipped lunch, play somemore, dinner, play, sleep. at this point, the only things going through my mind was very basic, i wanted to get to the end of my game, and not end up late where i meeting my next seller to deal. i got fallout 3 and too human, on 21st.

week 4: 23/6 to today, 29/6
technically i went to penang from 22nd to the 24th. it was a great trip, ate great food. visited my grandma, who is slowly getting hard of hearing and seeing. visited my aunt who just suffered a stroke. they shaved her head, and now she has 2 big scars on her forehead. one of her doctors doesn't even speak english or chinese or any other language they understand, he just speaks malay. and there's some kind of drama going on in my extended family, my aunts' immediate family members, that i don't know about, and my mom's not telling me. funny how a tragedy brings out the best in us. and before you say you busybody, not you or your mom business go and mess up. it actually is my mom's business, because it involves and my mom and her husband, my dad paying for her sister, my aunt's hospital bills. so yeah, it involvoes my mom.

penang food is really great, any random stall you pick out in the street is going to taste awesomer(ya, i went there) than any stall in your vicinity, even those kind where you have to go out of your way to locate, because the shop owner decided to park his shop at some weirdass location, penang has about 1 stall per coffee shop of those quality of food. so you kind just about imagine the kind of food even penang-ians consider good, and the best part is i tasted them before.


so i came back on the 25th, got jet lagged and rested up, on the 26th, gt a headache and my left eye started twitching. after that i don't really have an excuse for not doing work. this is also the time i started to feel guilty and reflected. i started to think, among other things, that is the a levels path, the way i want to. don't ask me, i haven't yet come to any meaningful conclusion.

i also kept skipping lunch throughout the holidays, not because i was overwhelmed with work, my maid just sucks at cooking plus i wake up late so i end up eating lunch at 3 and dinner with my parents at 9, which apparently is not healthy. so to avoid scolding, i skip lunch and eat dinner at 7. but now my stomach doesn't feel so good. i'm probably just a few years away from getting some kind of gastric related illness like my father.


the season 5 finale of house was awesome!!!

i actually thought episode 23 was the last episode, but it was the second last, so the cliffhanger ended with one major character sexing up another. which i guess was ok for a season finale because then you have something to build on for the next season. then i went to surf around and only then did i realised there was another episode after that. i felt stupid. so i couldn't wait, and i torrented as quickly as i could. so there's a tale of how stupid i was. but anyway THE SEASON FINALE OF HOUSE WAS AWESOME!!!


www.lightamillioncandles.com

Twitch

My Left Eye Has Been Twitching Since This Morning, Does That Mean Something?

Reality Bites

i don't why or whatever compulsion i have for marking this
but for some reason i feel like there's a need to write this down

today i saw a link on a contact of msn. it said a sale.
first thing i thought of was that it was some clothing blogshop but i clicked anyway trying to click links and get to somewhere with more interesting things, maybe gadgets or funny shirts.

so i click on it, and saw a rather polished shopping site, not like the typical blog shops with different entries as their shopfront, a sidebar with tagbox for ads and arbitrary stuff like that.

anyway, it was a shop selling clothes for ladies. and more importantly, i saw an old schoolmate as the model for most of their products.



what struck me was that, for possibly the first time in my life, i saw someone use their natural gift to help themselves out, by natural gift, i meant looks and by help themselves out, i meant earn free money and merchandise.

i mean of course, i've heard of people using looks or talking to get their boyfriends to buy them stuff, but that was always from word of mouth, there was never any real confirmation that they explicitly did reveal a little skin and got a branded bag in return.

so, i felt high for who knows what reason and decided to blog it down. anyway, at least she's pretty. it would definitely help her business that she didn't have a camwhore-y look, which ot me is definitely a deal breaker. she does have the potential to be a model, or something. but that's her own gig, i mean i never even talked to her back in school, so i guess i don't stand to gain anything.


as per my to-do list, i decided to break down the average singaporean salary and show how i would splurge on it.

based on MOM stats, the average salary for 2008 was $3977 per month.

without doing any math prior, i will try to break that down to see how much i would spend.

looking at the CPF rates, i would have to give up 20% to the government, that's $795.40

and then there's food. If i spent an average of $4.50 per meal ($3-$4 for the food itself and $1 for drinks, give or take) so i would spend $13.50 per day. Assuming i eat everyday, i would spend $405 on food per 30-day month

For transport, if i take public transport and i travel to work 6 days out of 7, assuming i spend 70 cents per trip, if i'm lucky enough to work close to home. i would work 26 days and spend $1.40 per day, hence, $36.40 per month. plus trips i take on my off day, so around maybe $15 for all 4 days if i were to take taxi once per month, plus buses for the rest. so around $51.40 per month for travel

and then for rent and utilities bills, just as a projection or a target ( meaning by 25, i want to stop living with my parents), i would want to live in a 3 room apartment, if i'm still single. for electricity, i'm guessing 55 to 60 and maybe another 5-10 for water, so around $70 i guess. for rent, i'm guessing around $1500 from all the classified ads i'm getting on the net.

For phone and online bills, my phone plan now is around, $20-$30, but i'm thinking more people will call me when i grow up HOPEFULLY, so maybe $40 for phone. And for my internet plan, if i had the choice, i would go for the fastest net service plan, so around $90.

and then for different small little funds, where i keep my money for a rainy day, or when playstation 4 comes out.

i'm thinking around $80 per month for games.
$150 per month for medical and other emergency bills, if i don't use it, just save for next time.
$1000 per month for my parents, preferably



so after all that, adding them all up, i would get



$4181.80
i exceeded my salary by about $200. which is quite reasonable because i could just scale back a little on internet and games and whatnot.

but don't forget, there are probably other fees i haven't took into consideration like insurance, paying off debts, and romance, because girls are more or less high-maintenance. so i'm guessing probably $1000-$2000 over my salary.

so yeah, that's a lot of money.


on to other news, we had a 2s10,2s11 combined barbeque. OMGWTFBBQ. Quite fun, at least people didn't separate into their own separate cliques like my past experiences. the food was good, not much gigantic wastages. so great job i guess. thanks to samuel and everyone else i don't really now was involved in organising the bbq.


woohoo.

www.lightamillioncandles.com
they have 2 million already

It Took 30 Hours.

I completed mass effect
in 5 days
30 goddamned, repetitive, bloody long, too many motherf***ing words, long hours

but don't get me wrong
it was a good game, worth every penny
good plot, good gameplay, but it was really really long

you can shorten it significantly by skipping sidequests
but your game will be significantly affected, in other words, you will suck more, and suck harder.
the sidequests are so damned repetitive, and you have to talk to so many retarded people who actually thinks your opinion matters. for example. you can talk a person out of "gene therapy" for her unborn child. when you only know her for 2 seconds.

anyway, going to replay the game to get achievements. so, at least i'll be busy


onto other news, i can't remember which days i need to go back to school
and i need to find/make a blogskin because i want to put some to-do lists and i'm too awesome to use a pen to write them down

i actually have 3 to-do lists
Work To-Do List:
revise past work
- Finish the yellow book for maths
- Do the questions in that chem paper and that weird yellow book called the ten year series
- Read up on Economics tutorials and lectures and draw mind map on my bedroom wall, just kidding, tattoo it on my forearm so i can bring it to the exam hall
- Do the physics night study worksheets


Game To-Do List:
Finish Mass Effect [check]
get money to buy assasins creed
get money to buy team fortress 2
get elite license on burnout paradise
help my bro buy MS points
I cant remember the rest


Blog To-Do List:
get a new blog skin
write a post on stereotypes of players of certain instruments
break down the diferent things i would and have to spend money on with an average singaporean salary
write something about interest, how is it that something can be interesting to one but not the other
write about that pro-gun argument i heard from a podcast
write about how to sound smart
save the world from utter destruction, or just downtown tokyo


time to get cracking


www.lightamillioncandles.com
help end it

I have a lot more enemies than i thought

or you know, that 1, measly enemy likes to visit my blog, who knows?

Alternative mediums

I saw a great video "lecturer" if you can call him that. Daniel Floyd, *Character Animator (in training)* . He did a few great pieces regarding video games which make quite a few good arguments to push video games as an art form. While most (3 out of 4) of his videos typically have more relevance for media students or game developers, his one piece make a lot of sense to me, us or basically all students.



he talks about tangential learning, first introduced to me by Randy Pausch, lecturer of The Last Lecture, as he calls "head fakes".

tangential learning or Self-motivated learning is a much greater way of learning because, for the teachers and parents, it results in greater absorption of the knowledge, meaning when you understood differentiation, you can remember it longer than a week if you did it through tangential learning.

but what is it exactly, lets' use an example to illustrate. say you watched a movie about da vinci, called the Da Vinci Code (subtle right), and you got really interested and you googled da vinci, just for the heck of it. you could have just learnt about the vitruvian man and his other great works, and probably a bit about the renaissance in Italy or the history of the bible and all that. now you must be wondering, hey man not everyone does that, but just think about it, if only 10% of the audience googled, 57,600 people would have benefitted, and thats only counting the people who bought the book itself.

a lot of times, alternative mediums of learning are being overlooked simply because it wasn't direct. Turns out, according to scientific research, indirect learning is better. sometimes, i feel quite disappointed that such alternative means are not being used in the classroom more often. the suits always say that we are trying to expand your horizons by teaching outside the classroom" you mean it never occurred to anyone that the location doesn't make as big an impact as the cost suggests. i enjoyed the video lectures that are used in our GP lectures, not because the teacher is boring, but because they help people remember facts better.

if you watched the video, which some of you may while some of you won't, i'm not surprised, i myself am tired of looking at videos of korean boy bands and girl bands dancing and lip synching in my friends blogs also. anyway, i do reccomend watching them, great wealth of information in delightful animated format.

i am a fan of animation, and comedy. thats why i found this video to be so appealing. because i enjoyed being fed new information in a refreshing context. if you have any idea what kind of person i am, you would realize that i don't study for the sake of a piece of paper. i study because i want to know more about the rest of the world. that's why i don't mug, per se.

i'm not asking the gp teachers to go nuts and attend animation courses,(though i wouldn't mind spending MOE's money on something useful) but you may be wondering what other ways of transfering information is there besides the awesome animated shorts.

well, there's debate. i find it quite sad that this isn't used much this year, i really enjoyed them last year in miss ni's classes, even though they are more like presentations. i think underestimating debates is quite a big mistake. first of all researching for the materials and argueing, you already have one layer of information in the students' heads already, and for those who are arguing for the opposition, because you have to argue, you actually have to listen and you can't switch off and hibernate. and then there's the rebuttals and coounter and counter counters and ........ but you say, its too much stuff for one person, and if i set them up in groups, people slack off. well, its not really too much for one person, if you help the group split it up or "facilitate" the delegation of work, without giving away any answers. so everyone actually needs to work, and if need be the teacher can decide who to be the next to argue so people again cannot slack off.


and then there's the problem of people not doing work at home. well, torture is always an option. hahas. i really really understand this problem because i am guilty. heck i am so guilty that . well, its not a pretty solution, but there's the stress on CA marks or that seeing parents after prelims or something like that, should CA marks not work. i think a very good solution would be to use an interesting topic to start with. and strangely, you don't need an inherently interesting topic to start with. it doesn't need to be something likely debating the use of abortion or even something more local like whether Direct School Admission is good for Singapore. Heck it could be as boring as the canteen aunties. it simply needs to be "packaged" as something interesting like debating the need for staff and workers vs the alternatives (eg robots or vending machines). we are the Internet generation, the Japan-ised generation, we want instant gratification and nice packaging at that. we don't want big words and retarded statistics. ever.


and then there's the problem that it doesn't help you directly. well, content is most obvious. but the researching itself allows students to exercise the skills in considering all levels or PERMS or SPERM or whatever MREPS. As for presenting and arguing itself, students can be "reminded" to organize their arguments and present using AREEC or they are disqualified and punished to write an essay or something like that. if getting good grades for MYE meant less work, i would have gotten an A, trust me.


i know that teaching is a tough job. and i know that you guys out there are or know a lot of great teachers. its a stressful job as well. i'm just offering a simple manner to help you help us. hell, criticise this as much as you want for all i care, but let me know. i'd rather get insulted but improved, than insult you back and not benefit from anything. i hereby extend an invitation to anyone to criticise my plans in my tagbox.

i should be studying for economics, but this is actual economics at work, affecting workers all around me.
i finally know what subprime mortgages mean

http://www.crisisofcredit.com/




help them light a candle
www.lightamillioncandles.com

i got a lot of things i want to say, but i forgot

from an old friend and seniors blog.

before you go to sleep tonight, ask yourself this question. would you rather have a dream or a nightmare?
before you dismiss this, think about it. very carefully

when you have a dream, sure its nice and awesome and all that, but you still have to wake up some time and realize its not there.
but if you had a nightmare, there's always the amazing relief to wake up and say HOLYWTFOMGBBQ.

that was really food for thought.

and she went on to explain about not being able to realize the dream of going to Delaware, USA.
i'm not going to elaborate here

so i thought about it myself
i don't really have any really life altering or traumatic nightmares before yet so i can't say much about that.
about dreams,

for a really long time, i have made a small but true observation about myself.
i have no endgame. If you watch any action movie or anything where a plan is involved (particularly one where they rob a bank), its how you make the escape and then spend all that cash you so dirtily attained on a beach with some hot babes in bikinis around your arms.

but i digress, anyway, i don't know what i want out of life, i have no plans whatsoever. i don't even have a really legitimate reason for studying, at least i can't convince myself that it is true. for that matter, i don't even have a passion to pursue. at least for some people, if they left school, they could go on to be photographers and drummers and artists and all that. i don't have that. i don't have any "real" passion. what i have are "pastimes" or extended sessions where my hands are kept busy. the only reason i do any of the stuff i do is so that when the internet crashes or i'm in an mrt, i wont go nuts. i have an incredibly short attention span, and if i'm not interested anymore , i move on. and these extended sessions do not get me anywhere. i can't set up a magic show and be a professional magician. i can't barely juggle for nuts. i suck at pool. and i barely play games long enough for me to go pro.

so there. i'm really stuck. heck i don't even know what job i'm gonna take in the future. i don't wanna be a soldier, i can't run a friggin 2.4 km in 15 mins, and girls break that regularly. i don't wanna be an engineer, i just wanna play with a newton's cradle and some magnets. i don't wanna be an architect, i just like looking at buildings, i don't even have a portfolio. i don't wanna be a teacher, i just fancy the idea of saying things and people listening.

and all this i'm just talking about my career prospects. i don't have a girlfriend. heck i don't even know if i can get one within the next five years.
and then there's the other people, the poor and the less fortunate. all my life, i knew deep down i was lucky, and i knew i had to pay someone back. but i don't know whether that day will ever come where i pick up the courage to lend a hand. i knew i wanted to change the world, but thats just a rough hazy idea just floating around. i need solid concrete plans.



holy crap, wake me up.



i think i just bummed myself out writing this post.. anyway, that was not how i intended to write this. the post above is separated so i have a non-bummed out version

From Plato,

Until philosophers are kings, or the kings and princes of this world have the spirit and power of philosophy, and political greatness and wisdom meet in one, and those commoner natures who pursue either to the exclusion of the other are compelled to stand aside, cities will never have rest from their evils - no, nor the human race, as I believe - and then only will this our State have a possibility of life and behold the light of day

from wikiquote

quite an awesome quote

the only reason i can remember it was because i was introduced to it in the from of "plato believed that the government should be run by a small group of "philosopher kings""

philosopher kings is the awesomest phrase i have ever heard.

i could say it all day and never get bored of it.


without me, its just aweso

Superpowers

after watching heroes

i started to think about superpowers

woohoo. a little bit about my choices and the history behind it.

when i was in primary school, which was like the power rangers era and the still watching channel 8 drama and don't worry be happy era.

boys would always ask, if you can choose one superpower, what would it be, super intelligence or super strength. the answer would always be super intelligence, and the explanation is that if you had super intelligence to create other superpowers and give yourself. simple right.

and then i went through my secondary school years, trying to be some kind of loner because that was what i thought was cool, which now sounds stupid, but still cool.
at that time i wanted to be invisible. because that would totally blend in with my loner persona and i was totally not trying to conceal the fact that i suck or anything. SERIOUS!! (jkjk)

but ever since i saw the flash, which i cannot remember when exactly, but it is most likely justice league.
anyway, i wanted to and still want to have super speed. part of the reason is probably because the flash is funny, i've always liked certain superheroes for that 1 reason, like spiderman, the flash and deadpool a bit.

but super speed would still be on top of my list, along with electricity manipulation, i don't really think i have an explanation for that force lightning is just cool.

but still there are definitely some powers i would put as low priority

like:
super strength
flight
laser eyes
high tech suit (which isnt really a power)

anyway, tts all i have been doing for the weekend instead of studying.
oh ya and finding old tcs shows songs like 我爱精灵 2 福满人间 and 敢敢做个开心人
still gt some others but you can find them by yourself.

www.lightamillioncandles.com

Where to study

I used to think Australia would be the best place to study, after hearing all the cool stories from other people who studied there.
but now it has achieved 2nd place, but a close second nonetheless.

i now want to study in London, or anywhere in Civilised parts of the European Union.

firstly, its a relatively cold country, compared to australia which is dry and uv light is burning through

then there are the chio bu(s), i think people from both country are beautiful, though not as beautiful as brazilians, drools... But still, think of the accent.

and then there's the different atmosphere. Australia is the more outdoor kind of people compared to UK, which in my book is a good thing, until i realise i'm not even half as fit as them.

these are just some reasons i can think of off the top of my head. i still want to go to LA, California or New York to work or live some day, but not as a tourist, as part of the culture.

Euthanasia

There are two Hindu points of view on euthanasia. By helping to end a painful life a person is performing a good deed and so fulfilling their moral obligations. On the other hand, by helping to end a life, even one filled with suffering, a person is disturbing the timing of the cycle of death and rebirth. This is a bad thing to do, and those involved in the euthanasia will take on the remaining karma of the patient. However, the same argument suggests that keeping a person artificially alive on a life-support machines would also be a bad thing to do.
-Wikipedia

moral conflict

post 151

woohoo post 151


been a bad week
but trying to keep positive
succeeded a little bit until like about 10 seconds ago
when i read my tagbox

i write like a few posts a month for the last month, a few tags start trickling in
then the moment i start to point fingers, everyone starts to get defensive and say hey man frog in well, myopic, short sighted, biased, self centered.

that kind of comments

and ya i have had my share of really really nasty comments
every year
except 08, which was lucky

controversy generates publicity. in 7 days i generated like 34 hits or less whereas it took me around a month to get the same. its kind of unfair
it sort of satisfies the attention whore in me. just so you know

anyway, i am going to read their responses, so i don't end up being so myopic, you know. must learn from mistake. THINK FLEXIBLY.

and now i'm back

caixin doesnt have a blog so i can't like say much, and weijie did not grace me with a blog reply, so i aso cannot say much, and most importantly, my friend Eugene who is not from SR wants you guys to forgive me, strange


ok, so i need sort of like a response to respond to such responses to me responding to them, taking a goddamn photo.

wow

what a responsibility. and to be absolutely clear, i treat them as my friends, if they no longer do so after seeing what i write, i can't really blame them. but i write this way because i am blunt. stubborn maybe, but i'm definitely not trying to make any enemies here.

unlike 2 years ago


so caixin and weijie comes from 2 different perspectives.
lets' address weijie first because it is like easier. what i understand is that, if i work hard enough to achieve what i want, and enough glory has been bestowed upon me, i need not pick up litter, or some minute things like that. that view is what my mother has been trying to tell me all these years, and she's not wrong. the only reason we work hard is so that we need not do crap work. but the your focus of working hard is not to improve, it becomes to get out of this shithole, which to me is the wrong attitude. (again understand that from it is from this train of thought, not necessarily your own personality or mentality, wei jie.) so ya it kind of is wrong not to help. pele and zidane both made tremendous contributions to social situations in their own country, despite their success because they remembered that it was their country and their families and their people who supported them and gave them what it took to succeed on an international stage.

then theres the what makes me so certain they didnt help. i'm not, everything i understand comes from what i perceive, so if i had not perceived that you help, naturally i would have had the general understanding that you did not, UNTIL someone tells me otherwise, (does that make sense? it sounds kind of ok in my head) if i didnt see a tree get struck by lightning and that's why it's on fire, i would have thought some punks or dry weather, UNTIL someone told me otherwise, in a condescending manner or not.

and there kind of is nothing wrong with the photo, now that i think about it. i think

and then comes the frog in the well. Aren't we all. the only way not to be one is to know exactly what is going on with everyone in the world, so tell me, do you know what i do for council everyday, also no right, so that kind of makes you and me equal, (except that you didn't judge me or just that i don't know of it.) so now we're officially not equal. i'm the frog who made a noise, but you're the one who didn't

so thats' about it for weijie's comments, now for caixin.

he said they did, so now i know, kind of. and it kind of wasn't possible to help me because i was not in need of help, kind of, they were. " don't base you assumptions on me" "*base it on yourself" kind of did not make sense to me. what i think it means is that i shouldn't base my"assumptions" on other people, probably the stuff about pride and stuff, which still doesn't make sense.if gp teaches one thing, its that never ASSUME, and theres no absolute in this world.

so i cleared it up with caixin, he says that if i assume something and once it offends someone, its called accusing. which i now am guilty of. but that knid of wasn't the point of what i wrote. what i wanted to say was that when people work hard to attain glory, they will forget about the "little people", which based on my assumption is correct, but it is a biased view because i did not make sure that they were absolutely not helping them before i implied that they did not help others.
so that was kind of the falw he pointed out. i hate losing an argument

but the loser bodoh thing was absolutely true, because i absolutely heard it with my absolute ears. absolutely

when i talk negatively about myself, i think room for improvement, people think emo kia. when i talk negatively about people in general, people think i gt too much time. when i talke negatively about certain people specifically, they think im finger pointing and start to become defensive. all people are like that. me you bush obama track team councillors teachers principals staff canteen aunties. everyone.

in hindsight if i had not "finger pointed" maybe people would not have responded. if i had used the word sportsman or competitors people may just skip on through them and pass it by. but that was not the point. theres not point in being politically correct if you are just saying things that people already know. i have a unique style of writing and speaking in that i want to use words that provoke thought, make people think, make them reflect on why the world sucks and whether or not it is really their fault.

I live in an unfair world because everyone in that unfair world is being unfair to someone else. including me. that is why i remain pessimistic about everything and it generally hasn't let me down. or up, or whatever. i cannot understand the rationalization for being optimistic, like its ok you'll score that A next time or at least you tried your best. know that you tried your best merely gives you an upper limit. if you know you tried your best but failed, are you supposed to feel good, because i wouldn't. i would say this is not my best, i could have worked even harder and gotten that gold. trying your best becomes like an excuse rather than an encouragement.

oh ya and theres the mysterious Eugene who is supposedly in poly now and doesnt know much about my sr life. i just spoke to the only eugene i know and he just thinks sr people english powerful. so i don't know what your trying to do, but i unknowingly scolded my friend because i thought it was him. so congratulations.

go there now
www.lightamillioncandles.com
NOW

number 150

p0st number 15o

sr olympics was yesterday
gd job to all the organizers
now they know how hard our job is
hahas

all i did tt day was watch people run and then play upwords with michael desheng and sihao

but 2 things happened that day that really made me think

firstly, cheerleaders
no doubt, everyone was talking about them, i was telling a few of my friends we wont be seeing them anymore next year.
they did quite a "sexy" (close to being slutty) dances. and i was sitting next to my friend adam, who was once a cheerleader and i told him, that's not cheerleading, thats dance. he agreed. firstly, you had to give them credit for taking iniative to things like that, purely voluntary. so with that out of the way, they did mostly dances to pop or hip hop music dancing with their asses. there was 1 move where they just, in slow motion pointed their ass into the air swayed their asses across for like 5 seconds. so obviously, a problem in conservative singapore. lots of girls i talked to immediately mentioned slutty out right, no arguments there.

but then again,


it made me think, who or what made such "slutty" moves slutty in a negative sense. im not trying to defend it. it was stupid to do it in a school environment, it would have been better in a bar or something. what i'm pondering about, and inviting you to think about as well, is why is putting yourself out there, and attracting the opposite sex, such a taboo and looked down upon kind of behaviour. people tend to retort by saying, it cheapens them. but think about it, it is the person or persons who see them cheapening them, rather than they cheapening themselves. the difference is that their actions are the guilty party, but the people who perceive it and jump to conclusions. thats' my philosophical viewpoint at least, if you can call it that.

if i can speak for all guys, (which i probably can depending on how much u think of me as a guy) i would say that i am not very disturbed by this, but some will probably find it very attractive. For me particularly, i feel that it was a change of pace, not the best one, but changes should be appreciated for they are refreshing,( i don't know how much sense that made, but anyway) to me those girls are putting themselves out there and flaunting what they have, i would see them as the ones guys and lesbians target first in a bar, bang them and leave. and i think its going to be on a regular basis. i'm not saying that i may never meet someone like that and have them as a potential life partner, but who knows.

after that much talk about cheerleaders.
lets talk about something else. afthe sr olympics, i went looking for some friends to have lunch as we had a meeting later. so i went down to look for them. naturally or instinctively, i had this compelling urge to help them, even though i didn't want to help them. so i went to clear out the torch holding thing which had a lot of oil and hot water. thats not really the point. the point is that many competitors passed by us and the "official" helpers, those organizers and their volunteers, very very few volunteered to lend a hand. and more strikingly, because they were all wearing the same attire, the track team did not offer to help. so what i saw was them walking around the pe office with their medals and their jackets and their pride just walking around and posing outside for a group photo at the field. it really strikes a chord because you,(or just me) got this really strong vibe that they are the ones who are going to win but they dont spare a thought for those who helped them there, those who gave them the stage to do what they do best. this little line floated into my head that day. "in life there a winners and workers. winners put in all their effort and they either win or lose. workers put in all their effort and they either get recognised or forgotten." its quite sad. on top i heard one of them jeering at some mc or something for "loser bodoh", i cant really recall what it was about, but i remembered he was talking about the runners for sure.

life isn't fair, this adage is only true when you are the one at the disadvantage. no one who benefitted from unfairness ever complained. that is the ultimate problem. we know that life isn't fair only when we have problems, because we are self absorbed. we only know the problems that we ourselves face and we turn a blind eye when other people are suffering so we can benefit from them. Selfishness only leads to injustice. it's really quite a sad truth.


post number 150

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once

this happens only once

took me so long to garner so many hits, shows tt this isnt a very popular blog, hahas
anyway din get to change the blogskin in time

btw this is the 149th post

awesome


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Extension/Variation of the Chicago Opener

i need to put this here before i forget it.
if you don't wanna be spoiled the next time i show this to you don't highlight the words below

set-up
one blue and 1 red of the same card (eg. 1 blue and 1 red back ace of clubs) place at the bottom of deck, red on top of blue. meaning the blue is the last card of the deck

trick itself.
swing cut and riffle force. show the card and get them to remember it.
complete the cut in the exact same position. at this point, the order should be red ace, blue ace, their card, this 3 somewhere in the middle.
magical gesture then spread through the deck to show the blue
cut the deck so that the blue is on top
DL the 2 cards to reveal that their card has changed into the blue
close it and put it aside, but in their view, not in a pocket or something.. now the blue ace is at one side, the red ace is at the bottom and their card is on top.
swing cut again, but under misdirection or patter or whatever, drop the last card on the top packet to the bottom packet, showing the bottom red ace.
take it out and reinforce that that card is red
complete the cut keeping the top on top and the bottom at the bottom, meaning their card is still on top.
fan out and let them put in the card, showing that all the other cards are red as well.
now 2 things can happen:
1) (my preferred method, but needs a surface like a table, or the palm of their hands) take the blue card on the surface and spring the deck on top of it, retaining the top card as their card, to them it looks like their card "floated" up to the top, and then show the bottom blue is the ace, their second chosen card, as the finish. show every other card is red if they want to see.
2) same thing but reversed order. do a magical gesture. but show as if something went wrong and you cant find the blue card. then do some patter, to reinforce you screwed up and that the blue card is their first card. spring the deck show their first card went up to the top and show the last blue card is their 2nd card.

i can't remember

i can't remember the last time i said (or shouted) Oh My God out loud after i see something

this is gonna restart the whole counter again.

it was impulsively, Oh My God. kinda like looking at cute kitten scratching its head and going awwwwww

i don't know why i use the word god so often, impulse also i guess

The Observations Of G

you know how you have been seeing certain people throughout your whole secondary school life, but never really talk to them.

then you see these kind of people, whom you will never make the mental connection that they even talk to each other, actually outside of school at a cinema.

and then you realise that they are going steady and are already a couple. and you give that WTF face

all of that in a cinema in suntec, the old one. after watching Watchmen which you snuck into, but the auntie never bothered to check your IC. So imagine, WTF face in a cinema, after Watchmen.

and then a few weeks or months or who knows how long later. you blog hop and reach one of their blogs and see a picture of them together. again the WTF face reappears.

its really amazing how some people just don''t look like a couple when they stand next to each other. Bu Pei Jiu Shi Bu Pei

another observation of G

Isn't It Strange How Proper Lighting Needs An Umbrella To Work Properly

so strange

i wanna change my blogskin before my 10,000th visitor
but i can't find a nice one
all the other blogskins just don't "feel" like it belongs to my blog
weird

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Funny

the National Service Registration website
when did homosexuality become either a social or medical problem

or u noe that they need to know if you smoke and have tattoos

woohoo twilight

sux

hahas

now i actually have some kind of idea wtf the story is about, i will attempt to convince you that this is not a novel teenage girls or anyone, for that matter, should read

i will attempt to dissect this book

without reading it........................lol

this is coming from a guy, a physics student with no background in literature whatsoever. so it may sound a bit unprofessional and you know, honest.

i came across 2 articles recently, which brought up the topic of twilight, and vampires in general

Cracked article on twilight
&
Cracked article on vampires

lets take a step back to when vampires were cool, or at least scary.

vampires used to belong in horror movies, with vampires like nosferatu and count dracula
they used to be scary and bite people, and occasionally had a reason to do so.
but the emphasis is on the biting and scaring

taking that away from them is the equivalent of taking the funny out of chris rock.

then we fast forward and reach twilight era.

where vampires sparkle.
firstly, WTF
rainbows sparkle
unicorns sparkle
care bears sparkle ( see the connection )
vampires do not

2nd, it has no point or meaning, either logically or as a literature device, is sparkling supposed to represent some innate goodness that only edward and friends have, which the rest do not. maybe im missing something here, but then again, maybe im not

then comes the writing style
Quoted from cracked.com:

The series is characterized by its exemplary writing style:

"Aren't you hungry?" he asked, distracted.

"No." I didn't feel like mentioning that my stomach was already full - full of butterflies.


now you see why meyers (the author) and the producers are swimming in money.

so you get edward, meyers godlike boytoy and bella, the really smart girl whom everyone likes and is clumsy. because every protagonist needs exactly one 1 flaw.

so we go into book 1:
From cracked:

Despite being so plain, Bella is admired by everyone in her new hometown of Forks, Washington, especially Edward Cullen. Originally, Edward just wanted to eat her, but, disappointingly, realizes eventually that in fact what he is feeling is true love, and after a couple of days they start dating. After two or three weeks, Bella is begging him to turn her into a vampire because of true love.

then edward shows off his glittery goodness and they lie on the grass
Three hundred pages after "Oh, you like me too? No way, I thought you hated me!" and that kind of crap, the plot jumps out the window and commits suicide


book 2!:
realizing how much i wrote im just gonna skip ahead

lessons from this book

1) If a guy dumps you and says he doesn't love you anymore, he doesn't mean it. All you have to do is beg and destroy your life to prove that you really love him, and he'll come right back and love you even more!

2) It is perfectly cool to string along innocent but decent guys who are crushing on you and then dump them immediately as soon as your ex-boyfriend reappears, and totally normal if said ex-boyfriend forbids you from seeing your old friend. After all, your love for your ex must be far stronger, because he makes you feel 'alive' and 'dangerous' since he's always on the verge of killing you. And stalking you. We can't really mention that enough.

if you read the book, think about it, does it make any sense?

FOR MORE GO TO CRACKED.COM

common opinion about this book is that it was written as meyers sexual fantasies rather than an actual novel. at least harry potter could have a little suspension of disbelief, for a while.

examples of good novels for me include: Watchmen, The Dark Knight Returns and i can't really think of anything else

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