post 151

woohoo post 151


been a bad week
but trying to keep positive
succeeded a little bit until like about 10 seconds ago
when i read my tagbox

i write like a few posts a month for the last month, a few tags start trickling in
then the moment i start to point fingers, everyone starts to get defensive and say hey man frog in well, myopic, short sighted, biased, self centered.

that kind of comments

and ya i have had my share of really really nasty comments
every year
except 08, which was lucky

controversy generates publicity. in 7 days i generated like 34 hits or less whereas it took me around a month to get the same. its kind of unfair
it sort of satisfies the attention whore in me. just so you know

anyway, i am going to read their responses, so i don't end up being so myopic, you know. must learn from mistake. THINK FLEXIBLY.

and now i'm back

caixin doesnt have a blog so i can't like say much, and weijie did not grace me with a blog reply, so i aso cannot say much, and most importantly, my friend Eugene who is not from SR wants you guys to forgive me, strange


ok, so i need sort of like a response to respond to such responses to me responding to them, taking a goddamn photo.

wow

what a responsibility. and to be absolutely clear, i treat them as my friends, if they no longer do so after seeing what i write, i can't really blame them. but i write this way because i am blunt. stubborn maybe, but i'm definitely not trying to make any enemies here.

unlike 2 years ago


so caixin and weijie comes from 2 different perspectives.
lets' address weijie first because it is like easier. what i understand is that, if i work hard enough to achieve what i want, and enough glory has been bestowed upon me, i need not pick up litter, or some minute things like that. that view is what my mother has been trying to tell me all these years, and she's not wrong. the only reason we work hard is so that we need not do crap work. but the your focus of working hard is not to improve, it becomes to get out of this shithole, which to me is the wrong attitude. (again understand that from it is from this train of thought, not necessarily your own personality or mentality, wei jie.) so ya it kind of is wrong not to help. pele and zidane both made tremendous contributions to social situations in their own country, despite their success because they remembered that it was their country and their families and their people who supported them and gave them what it took to succeed on an international stage.

then theres the what makes me so certain they didnt help. i'm not, everything i understand comes from what i perceive, so if i had not perceived that you help, naturally i would have had the general understanding that you did not, UNTIL someone tells me otherwise, (does that make sense? it sounds kind of ok in my head) if i didnt see a tree get struck by lightning and that's why it's on fire, i would have thought some punks or dry weather, UNTIL someone told me otherwise, in a condescending manner or not.

and there kind of is nothing wrong with the photo, now that i think about it. i think

and then comes the frog in the well. Aren't we all. the only way not to be one is to know exactly what is going on with everyone in the world, so tell me, do you know what i do for council everyday, also no right, so that kind of makes you and me equal, (except that you didn't judge me or just that i don't know of it.) so now we're officially not equal. i'm the frog who made a noise, but you're the one who didn't

so thats' about it for weijie's comments, now for caixin.

he said they did, so now i know, kind of. and it kind of wasn't possible to help me because i was not in need of help, kind of, they were. " don't base you assumptions on me" "*base it on yourself" kind of did not make sense to me. what i think it means is that i shouldn't base my"assumptions" on other people, probably the stuff about pride and stuff, which still doesn't make sense.if gp teaches one thing, its that never ASSUME, and theres no absolute in this world.

so i cleared it up with caixin, he says that if i assume something and once it offends someone, its called accusing. which i now am guilty of. but that knid of wasn't the point of what i wrote. what i wanted to say was that when people work hard to attain glory, they will forget about the "little people", which based on my assumption is correct, but it is a biased view because i did not make sure that they were absolutely not helping them before i implied that they did not help others.
so that was kind of the falw he pointed out. i hate losing an argument

but the loser bodoh thing was absolutely true, because i absolutely heard it with my absolute ears. absolutely

when i talk negatively about myself, i think room for improvement, people think emo kia. when i talk negatively about people in general, people think i gt too much time. when i talke negatively about certain people specifically, they think im finger pointing and start to become defensive. all people are like that. me you bush obama track team councillors teachers principals staff canteen aunties. everyone.

in hindsight if i had not "finger pointed" maybe people would not have responded. if i had used the word sportsman or competitors people may just skip on through them and pass it by. but that was not the point. theres not point in being politically correct if you are just saying things that people already know. i have a unique style of writing and speaking in that i want to use words that provoke thought, make people think, make them reflect on why the world sucks and whether or not it is really their fault.

I live in an unfair world because everyone in that unfair world is being unfair to someone else. including me. that is why i remain pessimistic about everything and it generally hasn't let me down. or up, or whatever. i cannot understand the rationalization for being optimistic, like its ok you'll score that A next time or at least you tried your best. know that you tried your best merely gives you an upper limit. if you know you tried your best but failed, are you supposed to feel good, because i wouldn't. i would say this is not my best, i could have worked even harder and gotten that gold. trying your best becomes like an excuse rather than an encouragement.

oh ya and theres the mysterious Eugene who is supposedly in poly now and doesnt know much about my sr life. i just spoke to the only eugene i know and he just thinks sr people english powerful. so i don't know what your trying to do, but i unknowingly scolded my friend because i thought it was him. so congratulations.

go there now
www.lightamillioncandles.com
NOW

number 150

p0st number 15o

sr olympics was yesterday
gd job to all the organizers
now they know how hard our job is
hahas

all i did tt day was watch people run and then play upwords with michael desheng and sihao

but 2 things happened that day that really made me think

firstly, cheerleaders
no doubt, everyone was talking about them, i was telling a few of my friends we wont be seeing them anymore next year.
they did quite a "sexy" (close to being slutty) dances. and i was sitting next to my friend adam, who was once a cheerleader and i told him, that's not cheerleading, thats dance. he agreed. firstly, you had to give them credit for taking iniative to things like that, purely voluntary. so with that out of the way, they did mostly dances to pop or hip hop music dancing with their asses. there was 1 move where they just, in slow motion pointed their ass into the air swayed their asses across for like 5 seconds. so obviously, a problem in conservative singapore. lots of girls i talked to immediately mentioned slutty out right, no arguments there.

but then again,


it made me think, who or what made such "slutty" moves slutty in a negative sense. im not trying to defend it. it was stupid to do it in a school environment, it would have been better in a bar or something. what i'm pondering about, and inviting you to think about as well, is why is putting yourself out there, and attracting the opposite sex, such a taboo and looked down upon kind of behaviour. people tend to retort by saying, it cheapens them. but think about it, it is the person or persons who see them cheapening them, rather than they cheapening themselves. the difference is that their actions are the guilty party, but the people who perceive it and jump to conclusions. thats' my philosophical viewpoint at least, if you can call it that.

if i can speak for all guys, (which i probably can depending on how much u think of me as a guy) i would say that i am not very disturbed by this, but some will probably find it very attractive. For me particularly, i feel that it was a change of pace, not the best one, but changes should be appreciated for they are refreshing,( i don't know how much sense that made, but anyway) to me those girls are putting themselves out there and flaunting what they have, i would see them as the ones guys and lesbians target first in a bar, bang them and leave. and i think its going to be on a regular basis. i'm not saying that i may never meet someone like that and have them as a potential life partner, but who knows.

after that much talk about cheerleaders.
lets talk about something else. afthe sr olympics, i went looking for some friends to have lunch as we had a meeting later. so i went down to look for them. naturally or instinctively, i had this compelling urge to help them, even though i didn't want to help them. so i went to clear out the torch holding thing which had a lot of oil and hot water. thats not really the point. the point is that many competitors passed by us and the "official" helpers, those organizers and their volunteers, very very few volunteered to lend a hand. and more strikingly, because they were all wearing the same attire, the track team did not offer to help. so what i saw was them walking around the pe office with their medals and their jackets and their pride just walking around and posing outside for a group photo at the field. it really strikes a chord because you,(or just me) got this really strong vibe that they are the ones who are going to win but they dont spare a thought for those who helped them there, those who gave them the stage to do what they do best. this little line floated into my head that day. "in life there a winners and workers. winners put in all their effort and they either win or lose. workers put in all their effort and they either get recognised or forgotten." its quite sad. on top i heard one of them jeering at some mc or something for "loser bodoh", i cant really recall what it was about, but i remembered he was talking about the runners for sure.

life isn't fair, this adage is only true when you are the one at the disadvantage. no one who benefitted from unfairness ever complained. that is the ultimate problem. we know that life isn't fair only when we have problems, because we are self absorbed. we only know the problems that we ourselves face and we turn a blind eye when other people are suffering so we can benefit from them. Selfishness only leads to injustice. it's really quite a sad truth.


post number 150

www.lightamillioncandles.com

once

this happens only once

took me so long to garner so many hits, shows tt this isnt a very popular blog, hahas
anyway din get to change the blogskin in time

btw this is the 149th post

awesome


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Extension/Variation of the Chicago Opener

i need to put this here before i forget it.
if you don't wanna be spoiled the next time i show this to you don't highlight the words below

set-up
one blue and 1 red of the same card (eg. 1 blue and 1 red back ace of clubs) place at the bottom of deck, red on top of blue. meaning the blue is the last card of the deck

trick itself.
swing cut and riffle force. show the card and get them to remember it.
complete the cut in the exact same position. at this point, the order should be red ace, blue ace, their card, this 3 somewhere in the middle.
magical gesture then spread through the deck to show the blue
cut the deck so that the blue is on top
DL the 2 cards to reveal that their card has changed into the blue
close it and put it aside, but in their view, not in a pocket or something.. now the blue ace is at one side, the red ace is at the bottom and their card is on top.
swing cut again, but under misdirection or patter or whatever, drop the last card on the top packet to the bottom packet, showing the bottom red ace.
take it out and reinforce that that card is red
complete the cut keeping the top on top and the bottom at the bottom, meaning their card is still on top.
fan out and let them put in the card, showing that all the other cards are red as well.
now 2 things can happen:
1) (my preferred method, but needs a surface like a table, or the palm of their hands) take the blue card on the surface and spring the deck on top of it, retaining the top card as their card, to them it looks like their card "floated" up to the top, and then show the bottom blue is the ace, their second chosen card, as the finish. show every other card is red if they want to see.
2) same thing but reversed order. do a magical gesture. but show as if something went wrong and you cant find the blue card. then do some patter, to reinforce you screwed up and that the blue card is their first card. spring the deck show their first card went up to the top and show the last blue card is their 2nd card.

i can't remember

i can't remember the last time i said (or shouted) Oh My God out loud after i see something

this is gonna restart the whole counter again.

it was impulsively, Oh My God. kinda like looking at cute kitten scratching its head and going awwwwww

i don't know why i use the word god so often, impulse also i guess

The Observations Of G

you know how you have been seeing certain people throughout your whole secondary school life, but never really talk to them.

then you see these kind of people, whom you will never make the mental connection that they even talk to each other, actually outside of school at a cinema.

and then you realise that they are going steady and are already a couple. and you give that WTF face

all of that in a cinema in suntec, the old one. after watching Watchmen which you snuck into, but the auntie never bothered to check your IC. So imagine, WTF face in a cinema, after Watchmen.

and then a few weeks or months or who knows how long later. you blog hop and reach one of their blogs and see a picture of them together. again the WTF face reappears.

its really amazing how some people just don''t look like a couple when they stand next to each other. Bu Pei Jiu Shi Bu Pei

another observation of G

Isn't It Strange How Proper Lighting Needs An Umbrella To Work Properly

so strange

i wanna change my blogskin before my 10,000th visitor
but i can't find a nice one
all the other blogskins just don't "feel" like it belongs to my blog
weird

www.lightamillioncandles.com

Funny

the National Service Registration website
when did homosexuality become either a social or medical problem

or u noe that they need to know if you smoke and have tattoos

woohoo twilight

sux

hahas

now i actually have some kind of idea wtf the story is about, i will attempt to convince you that this is not a novel teenage girls or anyone, for that matter, should read

i will attempt to dissect this book

without reading it........................lol

this is coming from a guy, a physics student with no background in literature whatsoever. so it may sound a bit unprofessional and you know, honest.

i came across 2 articles recently, which brought up the topic of twilight, and vampires in general

Cracked article on twilight
&
Cracked article on vampires

lets take a step back to when vampires were cool, or at least scary.

vampires used to belong in horror movies, with vampires like nosferatu and count dracula
they used to be scary and bite people, and occasionally had a reason to do so.
but the emphasis is on the biting and scaring

taking that away from them is the equivalent of taking the funny out of chris rock.

then we fast forward and reach twilight era.

where vampires sparkle.
firstly, WTF
rainbows sparkle
unicorns sparkle
care bears sparkle ( see the connection )
vampires do not

2nd, it has no point or meaning, either logically or as a literature device, is sparkling supposed to represent some innate goodness that only edward and friends have, which the rest do not. maybe im missing something here, but then again, maybe im not

then comes the writing style
Quoted from cracked.com:

The series is characterized by its exemplary writing style:

"Aren't you hungry?" he asked, distracted.

"No." I didn't feel like mentioning that my stomach was already full - full of butterflies.


now you see why meyers (the author) and the producers are swimming in money.

so you get edward, meyers godlike boytoy and bella, the really smart girl whom everyone likes and is clumsy. because every protagonist needs exactly one 1 flaw.

so we go into book 1:
From cracked:

Despite being so plain, Bella is admired by everyone in her new hometown of Forks, Washington, especially Edward Cullen. Originally, Edward just wanted to eat her, but, disappointingly, realizes eventually that in fact what he is feeling is true love, and after a couple of days they start dating. After two or three weeks, Bella is begging him to turn her into a vampire because of true love.

then edward shows off his glittery goodness and they lie on the grass
Three hundred pages after "Oh, you like me too? No way, I thought you hated me!" and that kind of crap, the plot jumps out the window and commits suicide


book 2!:
realizing how much i wrote im just gonna skip ahead

lessons from this book

1) If a guy dumps you and says he doesn't love you anymore, he doesn't mean it. All you have to do is beg and destroy your life to prove that you really love him, and he'll come right back and love you even more!

2) It is perfectly cool to string along innocent but decent guys who are crushing on you and then dump them immediately as soon as your ex-boyfriend reappears, and totally normal if said ex-boyfriend forbids you from seeing your old friend. After all, your love for your ex must be far stronger, because he makes you feel 'alive' and 'dangerous' since he's always on the verge of killing you. And stalking you. We can't really mention that enough.

if you read the book, think about it, does it make any sense?

FOR MORE GO TO CRACKED.COM

common opinion about this book is that it was written as meyers sexual fantasies rather than an actual novel. at least harry potter could have a little suspension of disbelief, for a while.

examples of good novels for me include: Watchmen, The Dark Knight Returns and i can't really think of anything else

www.lightamillioncandles.com

random updates

been really tired lately
homework's been piling up
plus i bought burnout paradise which is fun
really fun

anyway
lots of file checks
so that means i nid to actually do the work
plus all the subjects have extra enrichment and special attention and all tt
so like don't be surprised to stay back til 8 pm with a teacher who's there to look at u do work

naha hasnt given me back my cards
and mr yong's training is killing my arms
just very tired

tts all i have to write for now
i had thought about quite a bit for the last 2 days but i can't remember

reflections

my bro just came back from his npcc leisure camp
brings back a lot of old memories
went looking for old pictures and looking at old friends' blogs
wonder what happened

when did they become "old" friends
when did i stop talking to them
time does that

anyway
gave him a bit of advice before he went off to his camp
i don't think he needed much of it
he had a kind of friendly personality, which kind of made him stand out from the rest
he would make a much better cadet than me
at least in lower sec

anyway, he told me he got nominated for best camper, got third place
i felt really proud of him
but i din tell him
i think he would have been the first
but i din tell him

anyway, he also told me that a lot of my "old" friends knew that he was my brother
i wanted to drop by and pay a visit
but never did
it never feels appropriate
feel like getting some of my old squadmates and just see a campfire or something
never did
don't wanna turn up like an unwanted guest
so i never did
anyone who is still in holy np, invite me back for something leh !

i dun wanna go back by myself
it feels really awkward
the people whom i talk to tend to be busy
while the rest, i dont have much to talk about
on the HI anniversary when i went back, i literally had nothing to talk about
i just went up, said hi, talked about a camp for like 3 sentences and just said goodbye

it just feels really awkward
hard to explain

saw a lot of them grasp opportunities given to them
regretted i never did
they are planning for events for an area 7 of around 8-9 schools when they are 16-17
while i took on my first school wide organizing in J2
always felt i had late development
like im a late boomer
or just a late


thing

i used to blame other people for not giving me the opportunity to shine, especially people in higher position
but now in council, and seeing my brother, i realized that it was never because there was no opportunity
i just never grasped it
my brother showed me that
just a little too late i guess
but like the principal says
you still have a long way to go, i mean i'm not wishing you any bad luck
but are you sure that you haven't passed the halfway mark of your life

i sure hope so too

anyway, miss the old days
wish they were back
miss my old friends
wish they would talk
miss my uniform
wish i could do drills in

miss np
alot


i think this is all nostalgic

anyone who reads this, still in np, let's organize a get-together, put all the ugly memories behind us and enjoy each others' company for a day


had the principal's rally yesterday
quite long
but interesting
i can't really remember what he said
but i remember dreams, perseverance, not knowing where you are in life

and horse breaking
and that swimmer
and lky and marina barrage
and terry fox

and that's about it

hope my brother can excel in NPCC


www.lightamillioncandles.com

BTW

My school ran out of water and i got a E for a levels chinese


and


my dog is afraid of thunder

really afraid

I Want To

Work In A Place Where Explosions Happen On A Regular Basis

Kind Of Like MythBusters, Except Less Cameras

Also, Lego, I want to work there too

or bartending, thats cool too

or teaching

or architect, but that needs an interview just to get into the faculty, nt even employment yet


in the mean time, i probably have to accept engineering
or soldier, NS!!


www.llightamillioncandles.com

should i

question: should i quit?

yay!

exclamation mark


yay somebody tagged

woohoo

anyway, today was um
ok
bearable rather


nothing much happened today
tried to stay awake during class
failed miserably
hahas

had my napfa yesterday
failed everything that people usually fail
got a pathetic 190 cm for standing broad jump
did 1 pull up
it was more like half but it din matter
exceeded 16 minutes for the 2.4 run
in fact i almost failed my sit and reach
first time gt 39
den gt a 41 next time
all because i was wearing shoes
shouldnt have listened to the teacher
my shuttle run was 9.something either a 9.4 or 9.8 i cant really remember
all i could remember was running very loudly and stamping it trying to stop

so tts my week, nothing interesting



www.lightamillioncandles.com
more people must tag!

Response

people ask me why i dont update often in my blog

i dont because people don't tag

i respond to changes
that's basically why i catch things faster than others

anyway if you wanna see me post

den TAG
it rox


www.lightamillioncandles.com
they rox too

All magicians are

lying, cheating swindlers

but you know what's worse
people who sell you magic (stuff)

basically, because you are buying an idea rather than an actual item, most of the time. they can charge you exorbitant prices for that idea

so today i bought 2 things, 1 thumb tip flame and 1 ghost deck

the ghost deck was awesome no doubt about it

but the thumb tip flame was just a goddamed fake thumb with a wick attached, the metal even came off after 2 tries
i am completely disappointed with this and best of all, guess how much it's sold in retail
$30
thirty hard-earned dollars
you cant even light it on it's own, its just a stinking fake thumb with a failing wick
this will really teach me to do MORE research before buying stuff
but still i did try and find videos of it in action but i couldn't
so i thought lets go with the gut feeling
which failed
damn


the thing about magic being sold is that many times you will never find out until you fork out the cash
for example, a tattoo joe dvd is sold on the premise that it will teach you a trick that supposedly makes a tattoo appear on your hand and then disappear. that tattoo can be anything, a card, a name, a kiss

it costs 75$


seventy five dollars


and i torrented the video only to find out that the trick only included one magic marker
the trick itself comprised of using pantyhose with your words written covering you hand

roll it up behind your sleeve and unroll as you show it


seventy five dollars for that

i feel sorry for people who bought it

sianz still missing my 30 $


www.lightamillioncandles.com

Orientation 09

fun
tiring
3 months of work for 4 days
worth giving freshman a good impression


anyway today is the last day, i was stuck with ava duty, which meant i din handle any technical stuff, just look after the ava people and give them instructions
so that meant i couldn't hang out with scavenger hunt people
thats sad

anyway, the finale went quite well, but it was only after close to 3 hours of rehearsals before we got to that level, if it was like last year, everything would have been screwed up.

i saw a girl at the beauty pageant which immediately caught my attention, she had a very outgoing and fun kind of look, that was an amazing look for her, but i wouldnt be surprised if she had a boyfriend, i mean anyone who looked like that is bound to attract attention.

i also saw a lesbian couple kissing, when neither of them looked butch. i was looking through the bus window at the station opposite so it might have been a guy, might have been


anyway, the teachers were the people who did the most for the orientation so props to them.



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Lessons On A Bike

Never wear long pants, especially the uniform kind on a bike

orientation has been going on for today
i gt first aid duty, even though im not a first aider
first day forgot to borrow bike so had to take bus, dam waste money
so borrowed the bike on the second day
now my butt very sore from going uphill and downhill so many times

on the orientation, the response from the freshman were quite good, they were quite responsive, only maybe 1 out of 8 were not that high
i stayed at pounggol park the longest, cuz its the furthest and i lazy go back, hahas
i think theres a lot of potential to really make them go even higher, but i seem to be the only one caring,
i dunno, maybe because i'm that kind of person


anyway, a few days ago i was looking around facebook and i saw a photo of my old primary school classmate, which is very shocking cuz it changed a lot. the photo was like 1 guy standing 2 guys sitting on the floor, at first i look at the guy standing den i tot it wasnt him, den i looked at the 2 sitting down, and realized that since they completely dont look like him, the guy who was standing, ie the one i saw first, had to be him. i was so shocked that he changed i showed it to my other pri6 friend yang. he was also just as shocked as me
so we were wondering, if they saw us now after so many years, would they see a big difference,
i don't think my face changed much, maybe just thinner a bit?

orientation still ahs 2 more days, lets hope it goes uphill from here

week 5

the week was quite okay, skipped a few lessons because of orientation, so even when the orientation part was over, just took my time to walk around school vefore heading back to class

got my black tiger deck, last weekend, chink just upped and say, go dhoby gaut la, when we were deciding wad to do after chem lesson. so i went there and bought tt deck, very beautiful, but not cheap, at 12$ a pop, i am taking care of them well.

anyway, practised some prestidigitation during school adn after.

but the most interesting thing this week has still got to be this

feel free to look at bigger version

shocking right?
me and a bunch of friends were walking down this road along kallang when we passed by an ad of the body piercing shop, so he said i bet you $50 bucks he wont do it ever in his life. so i was like high or something and said i do now la

then this happened, im still kinda shocked it did happen.

anyway, heres another picture,

anyway looking forward to peoples' reactions.
hahas, i think im still high







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