Suddenly I See

We've got some BIG polys right here in singapore.
no wonder we dun have enough space for other stuffs.

thurs
went to Temasek Poly in around tampines area
one way trip
quite okay la, except tt the students very enthusiatic
everytime we enter or exit one school they start cheering, which gets really lame after a while
reminds me a lot about PSLs
anyway, itz quite a organized school, although itz big, they gt alot of exhibition so take up alot of space and make ppl squeeze thru so they dont break their exhibits
also got quite some people cosplaying but all very ugly. the onli 1 mildly acceptable is the guy trying to be L of deathnote. he still quite okay except hair abit wrong.
to the school itself, still quite nice. architecture still quite new, not much wear and tear on their stuff cuz they jus built(?) or something. but still quite ok la can get around the school without getting lost. we had some kind of tour or something so the whole class had to see IT,applied science and engineering until 3plus.
the engineering school was disappointing, cuz all the exhibits never explain plus all jus gt blinking light nia, nothing impressive.
throughout the trip, i carried wenhui,xiaotong n jelena goodie bags cuz they carry so much school stuff and im the only one that dun have any books hahas. but they also quite good la, the only ones waiting for me when i too slow. ONE WAY SUX especially when you dont know the way. whats the point of putting 1 way when u go so far and 2 ways when the school is so near.


FRI
went to ngee ann polytechnic
clementi area
its like a small town in itself. its really big and some are areas are quite high up compared to the roads on the highway
also 1 way so road back sux
REALLY REalLY big. starting go to some lecture hall for a video clip den aso get goodie bag
aso same help the girls carry bag. we went to some convention hall den split up liao. cuz no tour except at the seperate schools. met up with the integ ppl and takkin den go IT school first. quite far from the main hall. quite interesting, but aso disappointing cuz they guide mention bleach n naruto so the whole integ ppls all waiting to see thier face. in the end is just 'this the the room we used to animate' HAHAHS. den we go shuttle bus stop wait for bus. wait for 3 bus still none of them want to alight. somemmore so dam hot den we wanted to walk back den sweeswee gt 2 bus com at the same time, so we split up cuz bus no space. we went to mass comm with onli about 6 ppl. we went up 9 floor ON STAIRS cuz the effing adrain wanna see plus the lift overflow of ugly girls. so we went up to find them, lucky at the end gt air con if nt die of exhaustion. when we finish come down liao, adrain n ben say they wanna go see business den edwin say wanna go home. so i call jelena they all and waited downstairs until they finish their tour.yang and shuan waited with me. whil waiting saw kenneth and edwin tan(?) come down. den we talk for awhile den they go off. finally the 3 vip girls come down summore with black face. so dun dare make jokes hhahahs
later the guys n me met up and went for dinner at 401 near the church via 74 bus.



After seeing the different polys, i found 2 feasible choices to take.
one is Engineering/Physics
One is Doctor/Biology(wadever tt school is called)

but im not going poly im going jc so the choice is still very much open.
mass comm and IT is out of the question cuz my father will kill me cuz he thinks gt too much ppl out those diplomas and diff to get job
business is possible if i going poly but nt if i go jc cuz by then it will be too late plus im nt a businessy person
Applied science is out cuz CHEM SUX
Design is still possible but diff to get idea when stressed during exam plus i dun think jc have.


my father kept bugging me to be doctor or more specifically specialist(specialise in one thing like eyes or cancer)i always dismissed tt suggestion cuz i din think i could get that much of education. what if i failed, tt means i wasted up to 10 years of tertiary education. but now after seeing ppl in poly, i suddenly rmb my dad's suggestion. it wasnt becuz i gt smarter out of the blue, but because i remembered y i went for tertiary education. because i wanted to give my parents and my future family a good life. which i can onli achieve with MONEY and a good job. So suddenly i felt like specialist was my onli career choice and yet i dont seem to be working any harder. maybe sumone need to wake me up.

the other choice is engineering which deals with physics. yay physics. I love physics. so obvious choice. but my onli fear in this job is that wont get gd job in the end end up as air con servicer. cuz there may be too many engineers in singapore already. sadsadsad. zomg. somemore a good job in engineering is nothing compared to a small time doctor in a clinic. the $$$ difference is quite big.


WAKE ME UP FROM THINKING OLVL IS """ONLY""" a few months AWAY


"Suddenly I See, This Is What I Wanna Be,
Suddenly I See, Why The Hell It Means So Much To Me" -- KT Tunstall (Suddenly I See)

New Year Resolutionzzz

HAPPY NEW YEAR ok maybe a little too late
but Ive come up with a few new year resolutions ( finally)


i used the first few days of 2007 to try and collect 'opinions' of what people thought of me
there were people who knew me for 4-5 years but also people who onli remebered my name after 2006, so the opinions were quite different. there are still many similarities.

i did this to find out how people with different levels of contact with me thought i was. like how someone who knows me for onli 2 months thought i was, its a little difficult to explain but i wanted to know what kind of person i was from their point of view


so my findings include ( all comments are quoted ) ::

"erm...still ok.very depressed.think alot about life.often ask qns. gd 2 ppl. lazy.
easy to get along with.dif 2 understand me"


ok...quite expected except the "gd 2 ppl" part, maybe i am but no one seems to appreciate or thank me when i do ( or i din rmb them) so it doesnt stick to the mind


"can be funny.. straight forward.. quite cool at times.. pro at some kind of thing like paint and photoshop... good as a friend.. "


once again quite a positive 1, maybe cuz he knew me for a very long time, but cool only "at times" but still ok rite.

"u sometimes seems to find me at the wrong time"


basically it means bad timing, but i can see why.


"sometimes you think to much. thn is like. small lil stuff you think until so big. causing headache for others."

understandable

"i think u r a person who needs more confidence in whatever you are tasked to do... but i believe, u can do great things if you have the correct attitude towards the things you have to face.... =)"


obviously this comes from someone much wiser than myself.

"a gd fren, accept u keep on say i typical humility, then so much philosophy, others still ok, not serious abt studies, but other than that really a gd fren , can keep secret"

pretty much the same thing except the not serious about studies. SO TRUE and the can keep secret as well


"hahas. easygg lo, but stm i think u too straightforward bah"

wow im easygoing? but ive been straightforward all my life, and proud of it!

"DUNNO"

no comments

"straightforward guy"

read above for straightforward

"you appear to me as someone with quite low self esteem. thus, not being happy most of the time. kinda think lowly of yourself and don mix much with people. err...
from wad i see in npcc as well as in class last time la"

this was actually 1 of the longer conversations ive had about tt qns (what do you think about me?) cuz most ppl jus say DUNNO hahaz. but ya i agree with it mostly cuz tts how ive been in 2006

and then comes the most unexpected of all

"unpredictable"

WhAT? when i asked if it meant depressed like most answers ive gotten, i gt a no
I'm Actually unpredictable? wow


OK so on to my actual resolutions
1) actually study this year
2) be less depressed, i dunno how tts actually possible but...
3)get better timing
4)always tell people of how straightforward i am so they do not get hurt as much
5) get a CHIO girl to fall in love with me ( so far that has not happened yet, oh well )
6) umm make more friends who will remeber me after my secondary school years

5 Days Left Before Hell Starts Anew

SIANZ 5 more days niaz.

November seemed very slow but december seemed very fast.
WHY the teachers take away our 2 weeks if not is just nice 2 months of holidays liaoz

SIANZ

5 more days and we sec 4s liaoz
have to prepare o lvls
i haven done any homework yetz
imagine teacher's reaction

SIANZ
onli 4544 hitz on my blog since it first started on January this year (i think)

Can someone spam refresh on my blog so i can show off my 5000 hits banner on my blog

PLEASE at least in 3 days time so atleast i have 5000 before the new year starts

PLEASE

and if you want to be rmbed put a tag on the tagboard so I know you helped me gt 5000 hits

You will not be forgotten

hahahz

PS i din get any christmas presents this year cuz everyone was working (including me)

JOURNEYman vs RESULTer

"Reaching there is only half the journey"

That was an old saying

To me, results are far better and they tend to give me more motivation than the process itself. Im sure most people see results as motivation too. But just to check :


I eat because i like eating ////or//// i eat because i want to survive

i drive because i like the road//// or//// i drive because i like that place im going

i know i hurt people ////or//// I know i hurt people because
because i like it//////////////////they are in pain

Im happy with my marks if ////or//// Im happy with my marks if i know i did my best //////////////////i get better than somebody

I know i have great friends if ////or//// I know i have great friends ifi made the effort to stay close /////////they will remember me

I have a loving gf/bf //or// i have a loving gf/bf ifi love him/her with all my heart /////she/he thinks of me and loves me

JOURNEYman ///////////or ////////////RESULTer

this 'table' may be a little difficult to read

Personally im a resulter, even though sometimes i keep reminding myself that the journey is more impt, i just dont get that kind of motivation. Whereas if i saw my results which was good i will work even harder

As for me its the results that tells me whether ive worked hard anot. I tend to compare myself with others ALOT, even though they dont know it. If the event i was planning was successful, i know i did a good job. If I don't get high marks for a subject im good at, i will automatic feel very low, even though i did or did not work hard for it.


So its a matter of personality, some ppl no need results to please themselves. All they need to know is that they did their best and they can sleep well at night, without any worries. but tts not me

Im Bored. Period

Im really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really Bored


Haven't met up with the 2cha guys for 1 month i think, that makes it even more boring. tomorrow's the bbq, suddenly feel sad after 1 week's hype of it. maybe cuz pretty much everyone who usually attends cha gatherings are there so unusual faces cannot be seen Again.
]

I have been calling ppl up almost everyday for the past week, almost all phonecalls were not picked up or sms nt replied. IZIT BECAUSE I NOT IMPORTANT ENOUGH. have been calling np ppls and 2cha ppls, both dont seem to hear me when i scream. but when someone else call them at any given time they answer, WHY. I Not big enough izit. NOT respected enough izit. all the exact same ppl who my frenz call and they pick it up. DAM EFFED UP



I think the guy who invented the phone's objective was to let ppls have access to everyone else at any time, NOT PURPOSELY IGNORE IT JUST CAUSE SOMEONE like me IS CALLING.


2moro bbq is very pathetic, i think less than 20 of a 42 mamber class is going. and onli about 5 of the 42 member class is realli interested in it, the other 15 are just callefair. Bloody hell. STOP CALLING IT A EFFING 2CHA GATHERING IF CHARITY PPLS ARE NOT GOING, INTENTIONALLY.




Life sux when your not respected, itz almost like not having friends or having a mouth but you can't talk

CUT ME

Another Piece Of My Life...

I just found another piece of evidence that shows that my life, or rather, I suck.

I do not want to write the details down because i dont want to remember the details of this incident when i delete this blog and look back at the stuff i wrote when i was young and stupid. I just want to remember that it happened, thats' all.

If you want to know more maybe i will tell you, but im NOT trying to get attention or sympathy...

2 men worked at a company with the same salary and qualifications. One of the men is given more opportunities to organize the company then the other man, because he is a friend of the supervisor .

The other man on the other hand, is quite monotounous, doing the same things everyday.

But Both Men Work Equally Hard, Only On Different Things

At the end of they year, the man who worked on different events was given twice the christmas bonus of the other man, and was also promoted.

The promotion and bonus was decided by the boss, who is fair, not the supervisor.


Isit fair that the man gets promoted because he is given more opportunities ?
Isit fair that the other man doesn't get more money even though he worked equally hard and keeps the company together, working on loose ends ?

Maybe not

but life's like that

Regrets are necessary to make people grow


P.S. BOWLING FOR SOUP ROCKS

The Anti - Life Equation

Free Will can be described as life itself.
To phrase it mathematically, it would be known as the "Life Equation"
The opposite also exists, known as the " Anti Life Equation"
It is used to destroy free will, as not having any will would be equivalent to not being alive.

loneliness + alienation + fear + despair + self-worth ÷ mockery ÷ condemantion ÷ misunderstanding x guilt x shame x failure x judgment

n=y

where y=hope and n=folly, love=lies, life=death, self=dark side
.

If you knew of this equation, how would you use it?

Get more money?
Get that really cute guy/girl to fall in love with you?
Get control over your teacher?
Get the whole school to worship you?
Get your birthday to be the next national holiday?
Get that guy you really hate to be your slave?

How many people would choose not to use it.
despite the power it carries.
Knowing full well that nobody can stop you.
There would be no side effects, no faults,
no punishments, no jail terms,
nothing

Would you still do it

Before you answer this question
Think of yourself as a human being
With Every Basic Human Right
And Free Will

Don't think of yourself as
a father
a mother
a sibling
a student
a friend
a caretaker

FULLSTOP

Just one of the many questions of life i manage to stumble upon.

The First Day Of Work ......EVER

The first day of work sucked. I work as handphone sales at bedok, clementi or imm, whichever 1 has less people. I worked at bedok from 1030-2100 . The pay is about $30-$40 per day, so itz kind of a loss.

I went in with my dad at about 1030, then see a guy opening the shop. His name is Jason and he is quite friendly. he asked me to vacuum the floor before any customers come in. so i did for about half an hour. then the first few customers came in and jason served them, because he didnt teach me anything. So throughout the whole morning i just sat there and watched him serve. Then about noon another guy came in, Desmond. He helped him out a little and did a little paperwork. Then A Chinese Guy came in and asked me why he phone kept hanging up when he called others. so i tried it on my fone and it worked smoothly. Then he asked Jason why so he just help him reformat the phone and teach him how to off programs properly. Then after that, there was a message that it diverted the call, so he kept bugging Jason about it. Then he tried to ask Desmond to help while he went to buy lunch. then Desmond still couldnt help, so jason beg the guy to let him finish lunch firs tcuz he never eat breakfast, so the guy say that he will wait till he finish his lunch. So he try calling nokia hq but they also cannot solve the problem, then he say ask his friends who also have his friend, then jason become so happy.

After Lunch they teach me how to write the plan application for ppl who want to sign up a new line, so i finally knew what to do , at least a little bit. then the afternoon i just sat around until they have customers, otherwise i would explore the computer a bit. then near 530 pm, i was drawing on the computer, suddenly a voice told me i couldnt use it, i was shocked lor, summore the voice very familiar, like my past instructor during camp. Then as long as he was inside i just moved away or pretended i was looking at some handphone manual.

By Dinner, he went off so i just helped around a bit. I sold a few hi-cards and helped a few customers, by the end of the night.

My parents fetched me home, and they said that they might not have helped me if I wasnt their bosses son. They were the kind that are very crude in their language, so i wasnt surprised. I was thinking that if i gt another job where no one knew who i was, would i be able to slack. Its like they have to be good to me, or as they scared i tell my father and they might lose their jobs. So I was wondering how i would survive in the real world outside.

Many people I have come across call me rich or lucky or 'shao ye' (boss son), basically beacuse of my dad's work, and they treat me differently. I never really felt what the real world is like, especially those less fortunate. I probably never will. Although this is actually at my advantage, i dont like it 1 bit, because if you think for the one at the losing end, how does he feel that hos boss is treating someone else better than him for something he did not do.

Breaking Away From WOW

at 1130 hrs

im seriously tired, i have been plaeing the same game for 3 consecutive nights till 12-1am
if you know me well, you would know that i dont usally sleep so late.


The Ultimate Example of Karma happened today...
I shouted at my bro for irritating me and saying that he wanted to play my game. I really shouted at him. Then he go 1 corner cry and go tuition after that. My mum called from work and told me that she explained things to my bro. As soon as he is gone from my house, i gt disconnected from my game, hten i keep trying to log in back for 3 hrs that he was in tuition but cannot. then my friend suggested that i change my password in case someone was hacking, so i changed. then When he come home right next to me then i can log back in. AMAZING. Maybe Some Guy Up There wanted to take revenge on me for shouting at him. Who Knows.


after playing wow for 2 weeks im officially addicted. so far its th onli game that made me stay up till 12 EVER. my neck hurts

The PTM was irritating. tan bee tin kept epeating he is one the the brighter ones. damn irritating lor. She wrote the longest comments i have ever received in my life. Usually its just "Glennard is a smart and good team worker. He can excel if he puts in more hard work" or something like that. This time is almost extended version lor. Then Keep saying to my father that i can do better if i put in more effort. i gt 15 for l1r5, apparently nt good enough. BUt my dad reminded me of why i like that when he mentioned my Primary 4 life. During then, My Parents Kept Pushing me to get better results. Then my results were usually band 1 around 80. But they kept pushing me and i Dropped till just pass. Somemore my neghbour then p6 ad psle and went in raffles, so they pushed me harder, then i just fell apart. At p5 they just let me learn at my own pace,( although i didnt realise it then until now).

This made me realise how i actually study. I hate relying on other people. I prefer studying at my own pace and if anyone tries to push me i will just stop there. I actually learn more when i teach others, a fact i realised this year ( thx ).

Its only 2 weeks after exams and people are alreday getting back to the studying mood already. AND I JUST PAID $100 FOR WOW TO PLAY FOR THE HOLIDAYS. ARRGH!!! sianz. the 'joys' of 3 hum.

The Problem Is Choice

i have been getting this question a lot lately, especially since the Final Year papers are approaching


Why Do I never seem to need to study or feel stressed or can still be so happy and hyper when the exams are just around the corner, Dont I Care?


to say the truth, I care,


i care a lot

but i just dont want to let others know that
i like having a shroud of mystery around me
i like people thinking that im happy, when im not
but ya, sometimes the emotions overwhelms you and you lose control for a while
but usually what you see of me isnt what is real
a mere shell
but sometimes you do see the real me
thats when you start hating me
because i myself hate me
so i need to put on a shell
so i can live through my school life in resonable shape
i dont like people to care about me
i find that it puts unneccesary stress on themselves and me
so i need to put on this mask
so people will think im happy and well
and doesnt have problems at all
thats the kind of person who doesnt need anyone to care for him
thats how i like my life to be

but regarding the exams part
i dont study much
even if i do i do it subconsciously
i do it during lessons and listen in class
rather then going home and trying to figure out everything by yourself and failing
except for a maths ive slept throughout the whole of term3 her lessons are just too boring

i dont like to study
i cant read a book without sleeping
much less read notes
i have no idea how im going to make it through my O Levels
so pray hard that i dont fall asleep in class

i detest people who study so much that other parts of life are neglected
even if it is during exam periods
i think of it as being controlled
i dont like being controlled
some people may think of it as focus or concentration
but i think its a waste of time
there's no point sacrifising health and sleep for books
sure it may be important but what about the other days
they are important too

the only reason why i care about my studies
are because of the ones who love me
my parents
they are the only reason i want to study
i dont want to be a burden
i dont want them to regret having me as their child
i dont want to make their sacrifises be wasted
i am probably going to study after looking at my parents
having to be able to take care of me and my brother
with love and joy
even though i know they wont see this
i want to thank them for everything
i want to study well so i can have a good job and give my parents and my future wife and children
a comfortable life, even if it means having 1 meal a day
that is if i dont do well in my studies...


i hope i can do you proud

the most specialest day of the year.......................turned out to be like any other day

the most specialest day of the year
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turned out to be like any other day

yesterdae

lessons lessons lessons until 1130
then see binghui chasing xiaomin
then decide to rot there
UNTIL 1 still gt geog lesson
his lesson ultra boring
summore he say eoy paper is 1 and half hr
OHNOES
anyway, my parents picked me up to go bathe and take my ic photo
i think i blinked...
then go food court eat as part of bdae celebration
then my mum ask me what i want for bdae
i just randomli say rollerblade
then she realli go buy
first time no need beg 1 leh
then after tt go royalsportinghse buy
my bro try out then in the end he aso dunno then fall on his butt
hahas
.... then nuthing liao lor



todae 69

wake up then first sms i receive
from linda happy bdae i nvr forget hor or sumthing liddat
thx
then on the computer
let my bro play a while then some back
from dawn happy bdae
thx
from xt
happy bdae
thx
then chatchatchat then i gt a new mei and her name is
(drum roll)daWn tAn YAY (clapclapclap)
then rot online
from mushroom
happy bdae
thx
from jelena
happy bdae
thx
from gangyi
happy bdae
thx
THEN suddenli i hear vibrate sound i tot is from the computer
realised is phone
then pickup is joanna and jess and still gt 1 person cannot hear carefulli?
happi bdae
thx
everything within tt para happened b4 12


todae 69 after 12
rot arnd the hse then go down test run the new rollerblades
who know how to brake can teach me
after tt then sit there thinking
NO ONE IS GOING TO JIO ME OUT CELEBRATE oh well
who can blame them
i aso seldom give bdae presents to other ppl aso
or celebrate with them
serves me rite, maybe sum1 up there dun like me for tt
then give me 'bao ying'




SO after all tt time wasting space to talk abt myself
i want to use this space below to write about steve irwin
this maybe a post for my bdae but i feel tt out of respect he deserves a little recognition


He was a rather impressive person
he gt popular without using gimmicks or songs or frauds
he gt popular bcuz he cared about preservation of wildlife
and he didnt stop there he still continued to spread the word on wildlife
he is a unique individual who rose to fame for a good cause nt like singers or actors
he rose to fame bcuz he cared about wildlife
nt by singing or acting on the silver screen
i may nt watch him much but i think he shld have lived longer
we need more people like him on earth
more people who use their influence for the good of the world
nt like paris hilton
or eminem
or jj
or milubing
or jim carrey
im nt dissing them or anything
im just saying that we shld spend less time and attention on them
and more time on the more important things like
wildlife or recycling
or whatever


this post was way too long

To compliment Yang's post

IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...IM CRAZY...


haha i crazy le my thinking wont change de will alwaes be high happy hyper funny sarcastic lame idioticly funny
ya so if you are reallly know me, you can see sometimes is real, sometimes is acting with a really good mask la, so LETS ALL BE CRAZY !!!! yay !!!

btw sry linda, this time really really my fault.

another reason to bang my head against the wall

...
...
...
we are no longer ncos anymore
..
we were not good enough
.
even the TOs said so

we have no initiative
no bonding
no telepathy
no respect for rank
no nco mindset

i am just 1 of them
i think im the one who pulled them down
i couldnt help them just because im tired
i always shout at people even though its not their fault
i bring peoples morale down
i make peoples worried about nothing ( me)
i waste other peoples time
i think they are better off without me
i just cant help them
i just cant make people listen
i just dont have the SHI LI
i just want to make them a higher profile squad even if
im not in it
i dont wan to be the best anymore
i just want everyone give their 75%
iz enough liao
maybe without me they can do better
i feel like biting myself
for letting them down
for not being SHI LI PAI
for simply being there when we are scolded
for not speaking up when i have ideas
for not making people listen when i shld make a decision
for not making decisions when i shld

im sorry
..............

every single decision i have made sucked until now
every decision others make rocks like hell
everything i do makes people piss off and scold me
everything others do gets them praise
but if they include me in what they do
the decision automatically sux

im sorry

i cant help yu guys
i cant do anything useful
i only make you all lose face

sry


BINGHUI NOW I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL...

You aint never gonna keep me down...

Friday
went to the steamboat at marina. Edwin and priscilla planned 2 weeks beforehand then on that day realised dunno how to go. hahas. after training go mrt wiat for them from 7.30 to 8.30 then decided to go. hwen we at the busstop waiting for them, gt 1 auntie keep harassing us saying what 1person $12 all that crap, she keep annoying us until the bus come lor. when we reach kang yue take alot of eggs then crack into the soup until the colour like milk liddat. so very little people use the soup only use the foil for cooking meat. then later, ms nai and mrs goh come join us. mrs goh always behind other people's back talk about them like say teacher lousy all that. after the steamboat, all the boys go arcade except takkin who wait for his parents with yang. ben and me went to the busstop to go back the mrt station. we didnt the bus was 1 way so walk for three stations until the we wanted to take taxi, then lucky gt bus come. the side at night almost no light 1, not like hougang midnight still so bright. reach home 12.30 kanna scolding by my mum. hahas

saturday morning
games day at north vista again like last year. we reach there then realised that we need to bring the challenge trophy. hahas. i played for tug of war but i only played for 1 match. we lost the challenge trophy that day but i feel that everyone gave their all including the instructors who were always by the side encouraging us. although we lost, i feel that we shouldnt have kept on complaining about the game like unfairness or whatever, it only makes us more angry and disappointed, instead we should tell our team good job everyone, its healthier that way.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=P-bWsOK-h98 ronaldinho, footballing great
blame the coach for putting him in a bad position

U noe that feeling ...

U noe that feeling u get when u work very hard for a veryhat long time and end up you completely hate the results?

that feeling that makes you feel completely worthless because u think that nothing good happens after so long?

that feeling that makes you feel like kill yourself because you are making others who are better than you seem average?

i realli feel very very hopeless rite now

i am the lowest profile in my squad

im like the" oh ya still gt glennard hor, dunno anyhow put him anywhere aso can la" that kind of guy.

here is my proof

(tears are flowing down onto my keyboard as i write them down...)

Third class

I last to take squad, every 1 tired, i shouted command worng for 3 times then they see me so pathetic then do la

score me 0-1

creative parade

first day never do much, second day help quite a lot becuz no time liao, but still get last

score me 0-2

MOI first try at campcraft

a lot of knots dunno, then dun dare to speak up, then maam come teach me and them, so pathetic

score 0-3

MOI first try at drills

although i tried my best, t=they say no style and i failed pathetically

score 0-4

MOI second try drills

I try to make my own style but still fail

score 0-5

words of commands

I cannot shout, cannot break up command, cannot have tone, cannot have the "zai" in my voice

score 0- 6

MOI after school

my style is encouraging words but becuz no one respond then i cant do much, summore i dun have standard in my drills, not even in the top five when they chose me in the drill team.

score 0-7

second class

do my best to shout, help jian yong yo the toilet and become very tired tts why i lousy in drills , but still fail

score 0-8

posting

no squad leader

score 0-10

no head of anything

score 0-11

no nothing useful

score 0-12

now there is exactly proof and reason why I am the lowest profile in the squad.

just the " still gt glennard leh, anyhow put la he aso cannot help much" type of guy

BREATHE IN, BREATHE OUT, I LOVE NPCC!!!

The NCO CAMP 06,


I have only one word to describe it , MARVELOUS

It was 1 of the very very few times that I volunteered myself because i wanted to, not like usually because nobody wants to do it.
It was also 1 of the even fewer times where I was praised for my efforts in npcc as an individual.

Some of the highlights of the camp was the creative parade. My Creative parade grp gt Me,linda,guanzhong,gangyi,jingyi,cheeseng,junliang,eugene,weiting, still gt 2 more i forget name, lols pai seh. Basically, Come up with a unique parade that can involve anything. Sounds simple? HELL NO. We had no help from any instructors and we had no idea to start with. So the first day, Chee Seng was still in Msia and we cant teach him yet. Gangyi and me tried a few different ideas but in the end all throw in the dustbin. why? we realised for the first time that taking a squad is truly truly not easy. The sec 2s cannot concentrate and there was quite a few communication probs. So we were the slowest on the first day as the others had already started practicing. The next day was slightly better.we had 1 session before campfire prep, so we used the time to fuse all our ideas together to create a slightly better 1. Gangyi had an injury and cannot participate in the parade, but he really contributed alot. We managed to do about half of our parade but not enough time. Later, after the campfire, the instructors decided to change our bunk inspection to the actual parade, but WE HAVENT FINISHED PLANING. Fortunately, there was about ten minutes to prepare, and we did. but during the parade we forgot most of it like dressing and stuff so it ended up lousier than expected. but even tho we didnt win, i found it meaningful as it gave us an insight on being a squad leader.

Another highlight was the PT session. We had to take the sec2s for pt session for the very very first time. our group of PTIs include gangyi,junyuan,jesslyn,joanna,jianyong and me. jian yong and jesslyn looked around for safety measures while the others gave instructions and demos. I felt that it was quite good as every1s morale was high and every PTI participated. But the instructors felt that it was too long and we were "too high". Nonetheless, i still feel that all the PTIs did a good job.


Last but not least is the campfire. Its the first campfire we ever organized. before the camp we prepared a lot of firewood which took a lot of time. the campfire prep had the songleaders teaching the juniors cheers,while the runners and firefeeders(me) carried logistic items around. Our ic was jesslyn and junyuan. They did a great job of organizing us while the MCs gangyi and joanna were also good at bringing up the morale.

In an NPCC camp, there is bound to be takken-ing(scold and punishment) session. our session took place in the morning as the instructors wanted us to have a feel of nco standard before starting.

The first night of the camp was the bunk inspection. They were not happy with our bunks and wanted us to bring all of our stuff down to the parade square form our bunk which is at the third floor. Many of us, including the sec 2s dropped our stuff along the way. At the parade square, we were in pumping position as the instructors scolded us. Even our flag was rolled up as we were not able to portray what we wrote in our flag, SPEED SAFETY SERIOUS=STANDARD. Later, we went to wall for our half squat, we had to lean on some of squadmates for support. We were in that position for about 3-5 minutes. Our instructors were motivating us throughout even thought they were punishing us. They even took a photo of us in that position as a momento. It was really very touching, a few of us cried.

the second session was during the morning arnd 5 am. We were called down for a fire drill. every1 was late. jian yong woke me up and i couldnt even stand. my right knee was completely numb and i tried to stand three times but all land on my butt. lucky jian yong still nearby to pull me up. we gathered at parade square. 1 of the sec 2s was missing and the sec 2s were being scolded for not taking care of him. We had to help them search the entire school for him. I didnt bring my specs along so jian yong help me around. WE searched for a lot of time until the CIs decided to ask us return to bunk. After which we gathered for another fire drill. this time the CIs brought the missing person, joshua from the command post. He scolded the sec 2s as well as asked for reasons of the activity but they couldnt answer, so they pumped,recover,pumped,recover until they anyhow guess the answer. it was a good lesson for the sec 2s.

At the end of the camp, the instructors gave individual comments on us. I will wrote them here so i wont forget when i be an nco ( this is not to hao lian seriously)

You have done well in PT and MOI(method of instruction) but you should increase your profile in the squad.

I have really seen you grow up during this 3 days, you have don quite well in PT and MOI but brush up on your drills.

You are a firefeeder, you shouldnt forget your post and leave when you are needed.

You need to brush up your drills, but you have done quite well for your MOI and PT, good job.

good luck in your nco life and work hard for your post.

This NCO camp was amazing
I really want to thank all the instructors especially
SI Tan Jia Hao
ACI Lee Hui Ying
WCI Jocelyn Neo
CI Joey Pear

They really motivated our squad and me to push ourselves even further
I also want to thank my squad, Sec 3s 06 for helping me and each other throughout the camp

Joanna
Junyuan
Jesslyn
Jingyi
Gangyi
Jianyong
Chengboon
Anastasia
Linda
Guanzhong
Weichean
Joshua
Glennard

The sec 2s also helped out alot during the camp, thanks
As well as the sec 1s during campfire
THANK YOU FOR ALL THE MEMORIES

ATC + Mr Yeo = HUAT AH!!!!

Train TO Be A Leader

This is basically what the whole camp is about
something like a pre-nco camp without drills

trained to be a leader
to fight for our land
once for our lives
four years of our time
have you ever wonder why must we serve
cuz we love our unit
and want it to be first, to be first

looking all around us
people everywhere
children having fun
but we are holding gun
have you ever wonder why must we serve
cuz we love our unit
and want it to be first, to be first
The water at there s swimming pool water, suckz like hell hi spirit still nicer. The Atc very fast finish, Expected it to be longer.
This time i onli kanna 4 bites HAHAS

sianz, still need to prepare for nco camp and the graffiti

The end has a new meaning in my heart

Good News before the bad, the exams are OVER (ok they were over a long time ago)



BAd News, NPCC has just unleashed 3 activities in a row, BLESSING parade, ATC camp and NCO camp
firstly, the blessing is extremely significant cuz the principal likes it, or else no one wld have remembered it. She is trying to sell it to the catholics by making it sound good. i mean who cares, why should sumone care when u just feel like lazing at home rite?? For the first time, Im part of the GUARD OF HONOR, but before u celebrate, i DONT know how to do rifle drills as well as the sec 2s.

I wanna cry

the ATC camp is going to hurt me as we are going to UBIN AGAIN, YAYAY !!!! there is going to be a wet activity this time and i dont feel like bringin anything wet back home. worse still, we cant bring any home clothes there, onli np or skool shirts. its still quite okay compared to the nco camp

I wanna run away

Now, the NCO camp is going to be the highlight of this year, cuz we get to run a campfire for the first time. but i scared we not up to standard. the whole nco camp will decide what post we get. that alone leads to many questions. What if i dont get the post i want?What if Im not up to standard? What if The understudy NCOs are better then me? I WILL push myself this time, i realli hope i can do it. Joey told us today that our squad has been weak from sec1 to now. its true but its very demoralising to hear from an officer. He told us that there will be CONFIRMED understudys. that means we were not good enough to run the unit by ourselves that we need help from others. I realli wanna prove myself during the camp, i dont wanna let my seniors down. I dont wanna let me instructors down. I dont wanna let myself down (i am so selfish) but i realli hope to prove sumthing during this camp. maybe im just not cut out to be a squad leader. I realli wanna cry if i dont get the post i want. what will happen after that? i dont know. I hope i can be more iniative for my np life from now on.

I wanna hide from all my troubles and wait till they go away

Help me......

PILLS, the world could definitely use less of them

I hate pills.
They make children cry because of their bad taste
They make old people sick because of bad contents
They make aunties buy them because they are kiasu about health
They make men hate it because aunties make them eat it. See Above
They make ME hate it because of ALL the reasons above, except the auntie one.
In short, They just plain sucks.
oh ya, before i forget I HATE PILLS

You may be wondering why i wrote this. I have to take pills everyday, my mum forces me to take it because she says its healthy. The human body is capable of protecting and keeping itself healthy and working, so why do we need "health supplements" when its not necessary.

As I stared at the pills last night, I started wondering, What if they could create a DESTRESS pill? You take one and you are destressed. I dunno what your reaction would be, but i would most probably avoid it, possibly coz i dun develop stress like the rest of my 3 HUM classmates, thus im the 3humblacksheep. But still, sumthing that good will definitely have side effects and desperate people will deifinitely, i repeat DEFINITELY overdose and end up kicking the bucket.

So if it truly happens, there will be a huge craze over it, like the ones about slimming pills among three people, students, teachers and possibli workers. The teachers can abuse it during exam period like putting stress on the students and selling them at half price(just a thought).

But honestly, would studying really push you to such a desperate time that you will do things like pills?

Perhaps...

doing photoshop manipulation, failing horribly. O2 jam is fun. I haven study for geog [Insert random thought here]