Have you ever had the feeling?

where you close your eyes and you feel like your mind or your brain or "you" are actually leaving your body in this convulsing manner. It's mostly centered around your head area. The closest thing I can describe to it would be like taking the roller coaster or those spinning Gravitrons, where you feel like your body is constricted by the safety mechanism but your head is just flailing around and you're using your neck muscle to hold it in place.

It's been happening every so often for the last 3 weeks. Sometimes, it feels like my brain is "sinking" into the back of my skull and my body feels higher than my mind. Sometimes, it feels like my head is being jerked forward. Sometimes, it feels like something is forcing my head to turn to the side, and my muscles are pushing against it. Most of these happen when I close my eyes and try to sleep. Sometimes, my vision encloses on itself like tunnel vision and I get disorientated for about 5 seconds, which typically happens after I've been sitting down and looking at a screen like my laptop or my phone for too long, and try to stand up after that.

I think its' mostly because of my irregular sleep pattern these few days, but it's not really as irregular as most would think. Just a few hours here and there. Sometimes it would also feel like my eyes and eyelids are on fire which is very irritating.

I always think that just by sleeping for a while I would recover. But that never seems to happen, because if i sleep in the day i would end up to energetic to sleep at night and end up playing til 12 odd before I sleep. which is quite stupid.

anyway, stupid pseudo-medical condition.

Changes

6 weeks +

Direct ferry from UK to holland, takes ~16 hours and less than $100.

UK -- London (4 days) Cambridge (2 days)
Daunt Books, London
Thorpe Park http://www.thorpepark.com/ Roller Coasters (day trip), slightly south west of London, By train. Either 40 or 22 Pounds per pax,  not sure

Italy (18 Days )

France

paris (3 days)

Louvre, Versailles

Language School viable?

Spain 12

Haro 2days (wine festival is on june 29th, NEED TO REARRANGE)

Madrid-Arcos 4-6

Barcelona-Mar Bella Beach 4

NUDE BEACH!!

http://www.kitesurfbarcelona.com/kitesurfing-lessons.html
Single kitesurfing lessons 90E per person

Ferry to italy either Civitavecchia (rome) or Genoa, nearer to Milan

Venice (5 days
Madonna Dellorio
santi giovannie paolo
scuola grande di san marco
basilica san pietro di castello
arsenale divenezza (port)
san zacca ria
santa maria deicarmini
santa maria della visitazione
squero di san trovaso
palazzo ducale di venezia
San Giacomo di Rialto
santa maria gloriosa dei frari
Torre dell'orologio
ponte rialto (bridge)
basilica di san marco !

Milan(4 days
streets
duomo
armani flagship store
some other famous flagship store
saint maria della grazie
basilica san lorenzo
galleria vittario emanuele
Apperitivo drinks

Florence(4 days
Santa maria del fiore
santa maria novella - "I was once what you are"
san lorenzo
mercato vecchio/ponte vecchio
santa croce
santa trinita
palazzo medici (palace of Medici family) !
palazzo vecchio

Rome (Vatican City)-2 days
Colosseum, pantheon
St Peter's Basilica, Sistine Chapel,
Coffee, Macchiato, Caffè Sant’Eustachio
bookabar


WE SHOULD DEFINITELY GO TO AMSTERDAM!!

Storytelling

At one point in time, I used to think my life was boring because I never really had any stories to tell. Any interesting ones anyway. That was a point in my life where i went out very little and didn't have many outgoing friends, so i simply assumed that I didn't have stories was simply because i didn't experience enough of life, and that those among my group of peers who did in fact have really interesting stories to tell either went out of their way to experience life or had life thrust upon them.

And then i went to the army. Any Singaporean who has ever been conscripted, even as a clerk would have their fair share of interesting slices of life to share. And i did. I experienced a whole lot more than i would if i had continued and went on to the university instead. If i went on studying, i would always have this mindset that life is a series of semesters where you get one piece of paper in order to qualify for the next piece of paper to eventually qualify to put something onto that paper called resume and get a job. If i never went to the army, i would never really understand that sometimes you have to reach out and grab the things that you want in life because the System is not simply going to arrange your schedule for you.

But i digress. I went to the army, and i experienced life. I had some pretty interesting things happen to me that i could probably tell other people about. But for the life of me, i still don't really have an interesting story to tell. And my army life is plenty interesting, for one thing, I almost shot my friend in the arm, with a live round. And i got to fire the only Artillery piece that can be fired in Singapore, and freaking dropped the bomb in too early. I also go tmy friends into trouble quite a few times, biggest of which getting me a nickname, which i shall not put here.

And yet, i still can't hold someone's attention long enough to tell my story. I eventually figured out my problem. I cannot tell a story in front of anyone without thinking (or planning) first.

You see, i have a friend, who happens to be my Platoon Sergeant. He has the uncanny ability to speak and hold attention even though most of what he says is not very coherent. In fact he speaks very typical Singlish and he doesn't have the type of impact one would associate with a leader when he tells stories. He is only loud when he is trying to get your attention, which he never really tries to do when he is speaking to a group of say 10 people. And yet for the life of me, i can't figure out why he is so good at commanding attention of the room.

And I've heard quite a few of his stories which are in fact really mundane when you think about it, because most of us like to talk about what happened over the weekend when we book out. At first, it seemed like lots of interesting things happened to him in particular but as time went by, his stories are really all pretty mundane. Which is very curious because he hold your attention long enough to finish telling you a boring story without you realizing its' a boring story until it is over. It is quite peculiar.

After my interview with SMU, I realized that i had a particularly average incident that happened to me during my time as a student councillor, which could be spun into a pretty cool sounding story, which would have helped my interview at that time. Unfortunately, i only realized at the end. Instead I chose to go with one (during the actual interview) that had particular emotional value to me and to us at that time, and because i had such poor storytelling skills, i fudged up the story to the point where i couldn't really figure out what my point was.

If I do have such poor storytelling skills, I sincerely question any of you would really reach this sentence without skipping a few paragraphs.

Colourblind

I watched a funny short video about a guy who couldn't play Puzzle Quest (a game) because he was colourblind. He lacked the ability to process certain colours in his brain.

which got me thinking.

Colourblindness is essentially a group of people who cannot perceive a certain quality that everyone else takes as part and parcel of nature and the universe. But the funny thing is, colour doesn't exist as what we think it is. On a Subatomic level (or something like that, my physics is quite fuzzy), colour is merely a certain wavelength of electromagnetic radiation. In other words, it is just a vibration of a thing. Likewise, so is sound, albeit vibrations of another thing. These vibrations have no meaning until it enters our brains (not exactly the way you think but ok) where it manifests itself as an image. So our brains are the only thing that make any of these meaningful in anyway.

So for something other than a human, i.e a dog, he would not be able to perceive colour. But it wouldn't matter to him because all dogs cannot perceive colour. So if a dog were to "speak" to another dog, he wouldn't say something like "hey, check out the tasty brown steak" because colour doesn't exist in their minds.

Colourblindness is merely a disability whereby others can see what you cannot. What if inherently, inside everyone except you they could perhaps taste a certain flavor of ice cream but you couldn't. It would perhaps be disappointing but it wouldn't really strongly affect anyone in any way.

What if it was something with a much greater impact such as the ability to "smell" radiation gas which could poison you. That would really means something in a nuclear winter type world.

What if aliens came down and perhaps they could see all of the spectrum of EMR. Would we be disabled then? because all along this spectrum existed and we, by nature or our body and mind, are unable to perceive them and yet theses alien beings are. Would we really be disabled for not having something that we have lived without for the most of our history?

The Process of Learning Everything

There is this simple "journey" that everyone goes through when they learn something new. If it were a graph, the difficulty of mastering anything would become exponentially harder as you pick up more and more little "tricks".

I like to break it down to 3 simple stages that everyone goes through.

When you first start to pick up any skill, assuming you have any sort of interest in it at all, certain "big" basics you will pick up relatively quickly compared to anyone else. For example, when you learn guitar, there's the 3 simple chords and voila cool sounding songs. If you learn pool, you pick up how to hit the ball in a semi-straight line and hit another ball. To put it in a nutshell, as soon as you finish picking up about 70% of the basics, you can pull off some pretty impressive tricks, of course to an outsider.

This stage feels the greatest because you feel like at this rate, you can master the game in a few more months. Mastering what seems like a very big part of the game or sport or hobby, is an immense morale booster.

Then we come to the intermediate stage. This is where you pick up the really small nuances that will polish you ability that much more. BUT, it is going to take up a lot of time and a heck of a lot of disappointment. The reason is because the only way you can go through and find out what you don't know, is to do it over and over again and by accident, come up with a certain way or tactic of doing it that makes it easier. And people can never really teach you these things because its more of a problem of you than a problem of the activity. If you were learning a martial art, a certain stance or twist of the muscle will improve your ability that little bit, but your sensei couldn't teach you that unless he is observing you extremely closely, or he is very professional.

This is the stage most people quit because to go through this much repetition without seeing as visible an improvement as the beginner stage puts a dampener on you. Something I came across puts this totally into perspective, and even cooler, it's in video AND image form.

Ira Glass on Storytelling from David Shiyang Liu on Vimeo.

And then you go to the advanced stage. Now by this time the disinterested would have already dropped it, or at least stopped really trying to get better. This is really for Olympic athletes and the like. At this point, you're just going thru the motions to become what is essentially a machine at what you do, reduce mistakes. Like swimming for example, or tennis, where the winner is the last to make a mistake. It is incredibly difficulty to even reach this stage, but some do, and people who do are running on pretty much their passion. Which means, I probably will never reach this for anything because I have never felt passion, like ever.

So there you have it, just know that when things start getting tough, it just means you made it over the beginner stage and actually making some kind of progress.

The Comprehensive Guide To Understanding Glennard Part 2: Laws and shit

Many short sentences influence my decisions and/or actions. Many of these are actually quite contradictory if I were to sit down and think about them, but i don't, because when I make a decision, i think about these short rules.

I should really come up with a quick and catchy name, but i'm lazy, so i'll call them laws and shit for now.

Some of them are generic and meant for everybody, while others are specifically for me because I know my various flaws better than others. But almost all of them come from pop culture, so there's that. There's probably more but that's all i can remember for now

Here goes:

1) No one is normal so don't bother trying.

2) Don't expect things, so that when good things happens, it's a happy surprise, and when bad things happen, your hopes were kept realistic.

3) You can't move forward without falling down a few times, so why not speed up the process by making yourself fall as often and as quickly as possible so you can learn from those mistakes.

4) The end goal: Happiness.

5) Never chalk it up to a personality and character flaw when a person does something that you disagree with even though the majority of society does it. People are just generally stupid like that.

6) People are also seldomly DELIBERATELY evil, just stupid and irresponsible.

7) Creativity is the most important ability to cultivate when a baby is growing up.

8) Everything can change in an instant, don't be surprised when you meet an old friend who you haven't spoken to in a while and see him completely changed. One accident in the family or one bad influence can do a lot.

9) I possess all 7 sins, so when I get to Hell if it exists, I wouldn't be surprised.

10) Long-term happiness is very difficult without someone to share with

11) Money is not (currently) a big enough motivator to do something I dislike from 8 to 5

12) Memory is a fickle thing

13) Science is dependable, Art is inspiring. It depends on the mood.

14) Life is short, you are young, take more risks.

15) People are more irritable when they are hungry and just before a meal.

16) Own your work, whether it is terrible or awesome.

17) I don't do minimalism. I just have a nervous every time my own work seems too little

18) I will always envy people who can create art, because they are able to make work that we actually enjoy without having any actual purpose. In other works, people like it even though it has no practical use.

19) We all need to vent sometimes.

20) I'm always here to lend a shoulder to cry on.